Tuesday, February 28, 2012

A bit pissed

First before I get in to my vent....  just noticed that I've upgraded to an avocado! YAY! heh

Anywho...

I was thinking earlier when I was still waking up how frustrated and annoyed I am with my body.
Now don't get me wrong. I am THRILLED beyond belief that I am pregnant and got pregnant naturally which is a frickin miracle.
But I started getting frustrated when I thought back to all of the chemicals I had.
With how well my body has been with this pregnancy and handling it..... I just can't help but feel so annoyed.
Why the hell weren't we successful before? I do not believe for a minute that every single damn time there was some sort of chromasomal problem. There is just NO way. The very last chemical was only with one follicle reaching maturity. All of the others were with multiple ones. There is no way every single one of them, every single time was a bad egg. Just no way.
My lining was more than excellent every single time so that wasn't it.
Was it my progest? Was that the real problem?
If so, then why wasn't it a problem this time? I didn't start it until 9dpo.

I guess with my personality, it's just so frustrating not having an answer, ya know? I feel so bad for women with unexplained infertility. I mean at least I knew somewhat what was causing my own. I can't imagine what it would be like having it go unexplained. Everything working like it should, you have a normal cycle, you ovulate, and still.. nothing. It's frustrating me even thinking about it.

1 comment:

Toni Rapp said...

I can speak from experience on having unexplained infertility, it sucks. With that being said I have no choice but to accept it and move on and hopefully we will get pregnant soon. Congrats on week 16!You are moving right along.