Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Just a moment

Brief moment to post something. Or more like.. I actually remembered that I have a blog and my kids aren't driving me crazy and I'm not fighting to keep my eyes open.
Swear my body is trying to hibernate. Pfft, wish I could.
Eat everything in sight, go to sleep for a few months and wake up skinny lol.

Zoe's only been out of school for 3 days so far and although I like getting in a tiny little extra sleep.. I'm ready for her to go back to school :P lol
Her brothers love her home, but then they play which makes noise and I'm not a fan of that noise :P rofl
Plus their playing is started to get "No.. play it my way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" whining and crying and yelling at eachother for not doing it their way.

Anywho... I am taking this time to go through their toys once again and thinning things down. No idea where we're going to take all of this crap, but I don't care. I just want it gone. It's going to be replaced by all of this new stuff... time to get rid of the old.

I got the living room done... going to get Oren's room next. Put more bins in his room to store toys since he has a closet that isn't being used for anything.
Then it's on to Zoe's room. Ugh....

As far as I know DH's grandfather is doing better. He was struggling for a little while and talking nonsense. Like telling DH and and uncle that he wanted to have sex with them o_O And then telling FiL and that same uncle that he was jealous b/c they could have sex but he couldn't. lol
But on Monday, DH said that he was doing much better now and that they should be moving him to a rehab place soon. At least that's what they're hoping.
So thank goodness for that.
DH was getting frustrated with his family though. They seem to think someone needs to be by his side 24/7 when they don't need to be. And then at times, they all pile in to the room and take over so nurses and whatnot can't really do their job. Then they don't really listen to the doctor when he/she comes in and explains what is going on and just ugh...
They mean well, but they're frustrating as heck.

Our stupid dog Rocco still isn't house broken. We've resorted to just feeding him a ton in the morning and then nothing at night in hopes of him not crapping in the house. It sometimes works. :\
Feel bad for doing it, but we're tired of picking up crap. Bad enough when he pisses in the house.
One of those cases of... He's a sweet dog, but damn is he dumb lol.
Ezra flippin loves him and Rocco tolerates it like a champ.

I think that's it for now. If I have a moment and think about doing it, I'll post again... whenever :D

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Happy Holidays!

Whatever you celebrate or don't... I hope you all are having a great December so far :)

Things are ok here. Tired.. like... ALL the time, but it's ok.
We're done shopping for the kids. Only have 2 more people to get something for, but that shouldn't be a big deal.
We've been passing around illness after illness.
I'm still coughing from the last one and I think I'm getting sick again. Zoe finally caught it and has started to cough and sneeze more. Thankfully she only has a couple more days of school before winter break.
Looking forward to being able to sleep in... for like 10 more minutes than usual :\

We bought her (and kind of her brothers) a dollhouse. It's mostly for her obviously, but the boys will enjoy playing with it too. Just have to set it up though which is going to be tricky. DH will have to do it in the garage and try to hide it from the kids.

In not so great news... DH's grandfather is in the hospital with pneumonia. He was complaining about not being able to breath well so MiL took him in and they admitted him. DH said he was in bad shape when he went to visit yesterday. No one could understand what he was saying.
Hopefully the docs and nurses will get him better and get him home in time for Christmas.
Will not be visiting or taking the kids while we're sick though. Lord knows he doesn't need to catch anything from them.

In better news... had my annual and all is well. Well. I did learn that I'm up to almost 230lbs... yeesh. But other than that, I'm ok. Need to find a GP but meh.. I'll worry about that next year.

I've been trying to fade the color in my hair. Used 2 bottles of stuff called Color Oops! It's supposed to help get the dye out of your hair, but it did all of nothing for mine. I think my hair is just stained at this point lol. Oh well.
It did make it smell like I soak my hair in sulfur/rotten eggs though. Holy crap does my hair stink!
Part of the instructions is that you're supposed to shampoo and then rinse for a long stretch of time 4 times. So wash rinse repeat 4x.
I did that, then I oiled then shampooed then conditioned and my hair still stinks to high heaven and feels awful.
Just sprayed some old ass body spray in to my hair to try to cover the funk. Going to do a loooong condition this weekend too.
Just took a look at my hair and it did fade it some, but not enough. Oh well. I plan on putting dark blue in it anyway so not a huge deal.

Zoe is doing ok in school. I do not have the patience for homework though. Holy crap... I've lost my shit a few times. Not proud of that. She has a problem listening and sitting still and it drives me up the wall. She's not ADD or anything, she just wants to go play and gets bored with her homework.
She keeps getting in trouble at school for not listening too. It's minor things like playing with her lunch or throwing mulch in the air, but it's still things she shouldn't be doing.

Oren is doing well too. He's talking a lot, but still not potty trained. His frustration with Ezra has come out as hitting and pushing though. He doesn't do it to hurt.. at least.. I don't think so. When I've caught him doing it, it's more of getting Ezra to leave him alone. There's definitely some jealousy issues going on.

Ezra is good. Walking like crazy and pretty much running around nonstop. He's a little sweetie and loves giving hugs. He LOVES Rocco and lays all over the dog. THankfully Roc doesn't mind.
Ezra is destruction on 2 legs though. Good lord, he is too clever for his own good and just chaos.

THis momma is tired. TIRED

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

My back!!

Welp... I was doing something random last night. Nothing strenuous... just turning around in the kitchen when my back decided to just give up on me.
Started off as just a bad twinge, but then it got worse and didn't go away.
Having lower back spasms and it's so damn painful.
Thankfully tylenol along with lots of ibuprofin has helped take the edge off the pain, but it still hurts and it's very stiff.
DH is getting off early to take Ez to his appointment and getting off a little sooner to pick Zoe up.
Sleeping sucked last night too. Thought laying down would help, but nope. It was just as bad, if not worse. So a night with trying to roll in to a better position so my back wouldn't hurt but failing miserably.
It would be one thing if it had happened when I was trying to exercise or something, but I literally just turned around to walk in the opposite direction and my back just gave me a big ole middle finger.

BUT the pain has subsided some. Maybe b/c of the pain meds I took, but probably not just that since I took some last night too and they did jack shit.

Monday, November 13, 2017

He keeps getting hurt

I swear.. Ezra is a walking disaster. lol
Poor kid keeps getting knocked over, bonking his head.. whatever. He's still kickin though and going strong. He also wants to eat almost all the time, but he's picky. Boy.. you're only 1yo.. you're not supposed to be picky yet!!

Oren has a double ear infection. The other day he woke up SUPER grumpy. We just thought it was b/c he was still tired and b/c he had a cold, but later that day, he pointed to his ear crying and said it hurt :(
DH was off so he took him to the doctor. Thankfully antibiotics seem to work fast b/c he's been ok since he was started on them.

He's such a sweet lil dude. Oh.. I want him to get over this whiny crying crap, but last night.. he was looking at my wedding ring. I asked... "Is it pretty?" and he said yeah. THen he pointed at me and said "You're pretty too."
OMG my heart melted. Sweet lil munchkin!

After working more with Zoe on her target words and alphabet. I still don't understand why they say she's behind. She has some problem identifying like 2 letters and she gets most of the words and points them out regularly. Maybe she doesn't do it in school. I dunno.
Just going to keep working on everything with her.

Still concerned about my BP but not as much. I've been making more of an attempt to stay calmer in situations that would normally stress me out.. like the kids screaming/crying/not listening. Definitely think it's stress along with just being unhealthy.
I've been making christmas decorations which helps to distract me too. Not a lot when the kids are up and bothering me lol, but when I get a moment to myself so I can work on it.
Still going to mention it at my appointment and keep an eye on my bp.

Oh Ezra... he's also a lot more demanding than the other 2 were at this age. It took a while for the kids to actually want stuff from the store, but him... he does his little hand grabby "want" motion at the store and gets upset if we don't give him something. He's such a lil stinker lol.
He's walking better and better. Still looks like he's been riding a horse all day when he walks, but he's getting a lot steadier on his feet :)
Think he has an appointment tomorrow that we forgot about until SUnday lol.

Can't wait for THanksgiving!! Kroger (grocery store) had turkeys on sale and we bought 2. 1 for THanksgiving and the other for whenever. Going to dry brine it and smother it in butter. Going to be so dang good!!!

Tuesday, November 7, 2017

Fucking seriously people?

I'm not religious... I'm open to praying and whatever and I don't mind my kids going to church with DH, but religion in general just isn't for me.
With that being said though. FUCK people who are attacking those saying "thoughts and prayers". Especially those assholes who want to use their views and say shit like "They were in a church praying and look where it got them" about the recent victims in Texas. Ya know what... FUCK YOU if you thought that shit.
Just fucking seriously??
If someone wants to say Thoughts and prayers and you're not religious or think it's stupid or whatever... keep your fucking thoughts to yourself b/c ya know what.... saying how pointless and stupid it is on FB or any other social media isn't doing shit either but showing how much of a dickface you are.
"Oh instead of saying thoughts and prayers.. how about doing something?"
Oh like you assholes are doing by posting stupid messages like that on the net? It's only serving to make your egos even bigger b/c you think you're somehow better than the "thoughts and prayers" folks.
Just ugh.. so fucking pissed off at shit like this.

Anywho... still feeling off. Been checking BP every once in a while and top number is a little high but DH says it's not in the danger zone and my bottom number is ok too.
I'm still going to bring it up at my doc appointment next month and still going to check it randomly through the day when I think to do it.
Must... Start.... Exercising!
Already been cooking at home more. Just need to cut down on the carbs some, but that's ok. My big problem is the exercising part.
I'm just SO low energy though. I think once I start and get in to the groove of it, it will help. Just have to do it.

We went to an anime convention this past weekend.
Used to be in to anime when I was younger, but not so much any longer. I like some recent things that I've seen, but I just can't deal with the typical BS that a lot of animes have.
Like stupid over dramatic long drawn out scenes. JUST GET ON WITH IT!! Stop wasting half the episode b/c some character needs to have a 30min monologue about how they feel about something.
Just a waste of damn time and my grumpy old ass can't deal with it anymore rofl.
I want to make the kids some cosplay costumes for it next year though. It was so fun seeing all of the awesome costumes everyone was wearing :)
I think Zoe in particular would really enjoy being able to dress up :)

Started on some easy DIY christmas things last night. Painting paper plates to look like giant lollypops. Was supposed to do it for last year, but procrastinating and laziness kept me from doing it lol. Got it started though and I'll have it done soon. Just need to find the sticks that I bought.
Have some other plans too. Want to start putting them up NOW.
I know a lot of people think it's too early and "What about Thanksgiving!" If Thanksgiving had the decorations that Christmas had... sure... but it doesn't... so bring on the Christmas stuff!!!
Thanksgiving isn't being forgotten b/c I am looking forward to that stuffing and turkey too :D
I'll get some photos of everything I do. Hopefully I'll have a lot of cute DIY stuff to share :)

Sunday, November 5, 2017

Feel so off...

I think I'm having problems with my blood pressure. Need to see a doctor about it, but in the mean time I'm going to check my bp during the day.
Feeling so off lately though and when going to bed noticed that my heart rate just seems too fast.
If this isn't a wake up call that I need to start exercising, then I don't know what is.

Having this feeling for the last week or so.... it's really scared me. I want to be here to help raise and watch my kids grow and that's not going to happen if I keep procrastinating about getting healthy. I'm not 20something anymore.. I'm almost 40. While 38 isn't old... Plenty of folks are dying at my age from heart problems.
I can't fuck around anymore b/c nature is a bitch and isn't going to do me any favors.

Starting tomorrow.. I'm going to start. Need to clear out the area around the elliptical b/c I'll be doing that along with whatever else I can find on youtube.

In other news.. kids had fun on Halloween. We walked all around our very hilly neighborhood. Not many houses giving out candy, but they still managed to get a good bit. Mostly b/c we also took them to 2 different trunk or treats on different nights.

DH wants to participate in the trunk or treat at his church next year and I want to give our candy. Went discount Halloween stuff shopping the day after and bought mostly lights and some projector decorations.
Just want my kids and everyone else's kids to have the same experience we used to back in the day.

Zoe got in her report card. Says that she's not up to their level in identifying her upper and lower case letters and she needs to work on her "popcorn" words (specific words that they learn each week).
Load of bullshit.
Now.. I'm definitely not one that thinks my kids are perfect, but Zoe knows her alphabet and knows the words she learns b/c she always points them out if she sees them out and about. And if she hears us say them just in every day talk, she always points out that it's a popcorn word.
Maybe she's not doing that in school so they think she doesn't know it... I dunno.
Put up some alphabet stickers that I had bought last year and definitely will be going over her words more often now.

She also got her first school picture and... it's...... ok lol. The girl is scrawny, but she somehow managed to give herself double chin in the photo and this sheepish little half smile lol. She's adorable though and while I'm not totally happy with it, I'm happy to have it.
I'll take ugly ones, average ones, pretty ones.. whatever. I want them all!! :D

And Ezra has finally started walking!! He's really started to let go and walk more within the last couple of days and it's adorable :D

Sunday, October 29, 2017

2 new posts? Nah.. not really

I just forgot to actually post the other one so it has been sitting there collecting virtual dust this entire time. Oops...
Not sure what was in it other than the title.
Ezra still has a slight bump to his head from where he bonked it, but he's been fine.
He just fell off his changing table (aka his dresser w/ the changing pad on it) though. Thank goodness for diaper boxes b/c that's what he landed on until he tumbled to the floor.
He's a squirmer and does not like staying still for a diaper change. He's usually been ok at not falling off lol, but this time.. he went for it. While I was standing right there pulling out a shirt for him.. it took him all of 2 seconds to flip to his stomach and race right off.
Child is going to give me a heartattack.

Kids are sick which means we'll all be sick until next May.
Thankfully it's just minor colds and congestion right now.

My jaw sometimes still hurts. Specially if I get food stuck back in the wisdom teeth holes that I can't get out right away. Makes my whole jaw on that side hurt.
Scheduled to go back in in March to continue with my implant thing though. Just want all of this done and over with. Will be nice being able to chew on that side of my mouth again though lol.

Zoe's school is one of those progressive healthy schools. Don't get me wrong.. it's a really great school, but their policy on no sweet treats and not celebrating Halloween sucks balls. The kids still kinda sorta get to dress up, but it's Career week (like elementary school kids need to be thinking about that shit?)... so they can dress up as a real life career they want to be when they grow up.
I keep asking Zoe what she wants to be and her response every time is "a Rockstar!!!"
Yeah, she likes singing and making up her own songs, but not anymore than any other kid I would imagine lol. Just so random.
I dunno what the heck to put her in. May need to go out and buy her an outfit to wear.
Maybe like a doctor costume or something.

They had their first trunk or treat at aunt's church yesterday. Of course the kids had a lot of fun.
Everyone loves Oren's costume.
We got him a Groot costume at Target. Also bought a Rocket Racoon backpack when it was on sale and use it as part of his costume. We bought the backpack a while ago which is why we dressed him as Groot lol.
I'll have to post photos b/c he's frickin adorable in his costume. It fits him almost perfect and he looks adorable in it.
Zoe picked herself out an Ariel dress to wear. She wanted to go as some Shimmer & Shine character? No idea... but she saw the Ariel costume and wanted it. We didn't bother with a wig but did get her a little Ariel crown to go with it. She's happy with it and that's all that matters.
Ezra.. I bought Ezra's a while ago. IT's a teddy bear costume, but I also bought a brown men's shirt to go over his head so he can look like an Ewok :D
It's adorable! He could only wear it for a little bit bc it got too hot yesterday. Shouldn't be a problem tonight though when we do Trunk or treat at DH's church.
I'll get photos to post :)

Oren is talking a lot more. Can't understand him a lot, but he's trying.
Still not any closer to potty training. Just putting it off b/c I'm lazy and don't want to clean up pee and poop everywhere.

Already had to clean up Rocko dog crap 3 days in a row. We've been keeping our newest pup inside in the sunroom during the night since it started getting colder. We take everything he could chew out, including the trampoline every single night.
Not a huge deal, just a little annoying.
He was doing fine, but I guess the dog food or something is upsetting his stomach bc we kept waking up to soft poo piles. He had a couple of pee accidents too.
So frickin annoying having to carpet clean at 6am :\

Not feeding him at night anymore though. He'll get fed in the morning and have his night feedings given early afternoon.

What else what else....

Zoe is doing well in school. They get laps (walking around during recess) when they misbehave and Zoe usually has to do 1 or 2 for stupid things. Oh well... just so long as it's nothing serious.. I'm not gonna sweat it... although I keep telling her she needs to listen.
They get their first report cards on Thursday. Not sure what that's going to look like for kindergarten.
Can't wait to get her school picture in finally. Wish they gave parents previews of it like SiL's got. She could go online and look at the photo and also pick and choose which backgrounds she wants and in what size.
Us? Gotta wait and see, but oh of course we had to pay first before we get to see anything and don't have any customization options.

I'm sure I'm forgetting a lot of stuff that has happened. It's just all life stuff as usual going on :)

Banged the hell out of his head!

Ezra is a climber. He was playing in the sunroom on their little slide thing. I can't see it from where I sit in the living room. Guessing he got to the top of it and I dunno if Oren pushed him or if he fell on his own, but he did fall off and smacked the crap out of his head on a wooden stool at the bottom.
It left a giant knot on his forehead that turned purple.
Thankfully after some crying and snuggling, he was acting normal. I did call his doc office, but they reassured me that so long as he's acting normal, not vomiting or anything like that, that they don't have to see him.
Made my heart stop though.

My teeth still hurts. Not enough to need strong pain meds, but I'm gonna have to go take some ibuprofin or tylenol in a second after I get done with this. It's just a dull ache that's also giving me headache. Probably b/c I can't keep the holes from the wisdom teeth cleaned out I'm sure. Need to take better care of things.

Zoe had her school pictures done last week. Can't wait to see how they look :D I let her pick out her own outfit, but I made her wear her hair in pigtails.
She wasn't happy about that b/c she likes wearing it down, but we compromised and she did 2 braided pigtails :)
Kindergarten is going on their first field trip this Thursday to the local state park, but Zoe won't be going.
We already paid for it, but forgot that we were going to the fair that day. I really want her to go on the field trip, but we decided to just go to the fair as planned.

Oren, myself, and Ezra have a cold. Started with Oren. Nothing bad. Just runny stuffy noses mostly.

I think that's about it. Or well... all that I can think of right now. DH is off today. I took Zoe to school so I made him go to pick her up lol.

Sunday, October 1, 2017

I keep forgetting!

At least I think I keep forgetting.
We finally heard back from Ezra's heart scan and everything is perfectly fine with his heart. Thank goodness!!!

All the kids are doing well. Zoe got in trouble at school. They send home folders with their homework assignments and whatnot every day along with either a green, yellow, or red lightouse to symbolize if they were good, kinda bad, or teacher needs to seriously talk to the parents bad.
Zoe got herself a yellow lighthouse the other day for not following the rules and not listening.
She was not happy about not having her kindle for the day, being made to clean up, and being stuck in her room.
Told her that if she did it again, she wouldn't get her kindle back and I'd make her throw a toy away along with cleaning the rest of the house. Yeah... she got that green lighthouse the next day.
Going to have to keep reminding her for a while to behave herself in school.

Oren is good. Talking more... and tantrums tantrums tantrums. I make him go to his room to scream and cry and carry on. He goes on and on and on and it drives me up the damn wall when he does it. He'll usually calm if I threaten to put him down for a nap if he doesn't calm down, but sometimes he won't.. so in to his room and in to bed he goes to cry and scream and carry on while I cling on to the little bit of sanity I have left in me.

DH lost in on him today which pissed me off though b/c he had the nerve to get a tone with me when I zoned out something Zoe was trying to tell me. Like dude... if you heard her.. get your ass up and go see what she's talking about. I'm not the only fucking parent in this house. Just b/c they say Mommy all the time doesn't mean you get off the hook and can ignore them. And yes... I am DAMN good at zoning them out.. something HE needs to get good at b/c he gets short tempered with them too damn often and it just ends up putting everyone else in a shitty mood.
I love DH and he is a good father, but he is the type of person that can not admit to being wrong. Oh... he knows when he's wrong... he will just never say it and I can probably count on my hands how many times he's apologized.
Just frustrating shit that I'm sure pretty much all married folks go through. Not a huge deal... just every day BS that we'll get over and then complain about again down the road lol.

We're starting back up with better eating again. Not AS strict again. Like... we'll be having some rice or tortilla shells or something every once in a while, but more controlled portions with that stuff.
Not looking forward to it b/c I loves me some sweets, but I want to lose weight before we go to Disney.

Have I mentioned that yet?
SiLs want to go to Disney in Feb. It was for November of next year, but DH's grandfather doesn't think he's gonna be alive for that long so the trip was bumped up to Feb.
I wanted to save more money before we went to Disney. Also wanted to wait at least a couple more years for our other 2 to get a little older, but whatever.
Oh... I still want to go again though when they open up that Star Wars luxury hotel. Hell yes I want to go to that!!

What else what else...
My brother and his family moved out of their house. Their dumbasses weren't paying rent. So when MiL and them asked them to pay some of it. Not even all of it, just start paying some of it again... nope. They moved.
Good lord my brother is such a fucking LOSER and ya know what.. so is his wife. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt so many damn times, but she's just as bad. She could've easily have gotten her license so she wasn't stuck at home all the time. Could've made sure my brother wasn't such a GD dumbass at his jobs so he would stop quitting or getting fired, but nope. She was content and let that shit happen and kept letting it happen.
DH's family took them all in like they were their own. Thought and still thinks of them like family and all they ever did was shit all over that and take advantage.
Their rent was only $500 a month... and without even talking to anyone about it, they decided to only pay $400. DH's grandpa wasn't happy about it, but they're basically family so he let it slide b/c they're not rich and need a place to live.
 They RUINED that house by smoking in it and letting their pets shit and piss ALL the time all over the wood floors and never cleaning it up. SiL was home ALL OF THE TIME and never picked up after the animals and never made her children clean up after themselves either.
Now they've moved out in to apartments that won't allow animals and they left their dogs at the house. MiL and them found their abandoned pets at the house with a bunch of furniture and no water. I'm sure my brother lied to SiL and told her he was feeding them or some shit.
And I dunno what they're going to do when they can't pay rent at the apartment when he quits or loses his current job too.
UGH he's just a fucking dumbass. I can't stand him. I'm just done. There's only so much you can take from people and I'm just done with their bullshit.
If SiL came to us and said she was leaving him.. I'd help her then... but if she's staying.. nope.
Leave me and my family out of your bullshit.

Phew.. end of rant. Didn't intend to rant about that, but well.. there it is.

Sunday, September 24, 2017

Time to get crafty!

So I've been in a creative rut now for... forever. I'll get bursts of inspiration as I'm sure anyone who has regularly read my blog would know, but then it will slowly but surely die.
I need to get back to it though.
DH pretty much volunteered me for a ballerina shoe painting auction thing. I can decorate a ballerina shoe however I want and it will be auctioned off when the local play does Dracula. I basically have a little less than a month to finish it.
I just need inspiration now. I'm not sure how gruesome/gory I can go with it, or if they want to keep things more pg or what. All I was told was...  just do whatever!... sigh
Along with that, there are a few more things I'd like to start doing too. Like getting my sewing skills up a bit more. We have an anime convention we're going to in November and I would love to make some costumes for the kids.
Plus I just want to start drawing again. Our walls need more artwork on them! :)

So yeah.. we'll see. It's difficult to really do anything though when Ezra is awake. He wants to be part of everything and gets in to everything.

Healing up ok. Face is swollen and tighter and a little sore, but I'm ok overall.

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Well that was an experience

Had my wisdom teeth taken out yesterday.
I've never been put under before so was really curious to see how that was.
Felt myself getting a little light headed feeling and then the next thing I know, I'm blinking awake slowly. I don't think they were completely done though b/c they were still using a drill or some cleaning tool maybe for something and stitching me up which I felt. I woke up thinking that I hadn't been put under yet lol.
No funny youtube reaction though. Other than the left side hurting, I felt fine.
Did have to get bone graft done for the implant. Implant was not put in yet b/c there wasn't enough bone there for a proper implant to be placed so they had to use donor bone stuff and have to let that grow in over about 6 or so months.
That tacked on an extra 1500 or so to the bill. Yikes.
This is why people let their teeth go to shit... it's stupidly expensive to go to the dentist!
Anywho... I'm good though. Woozy b/c of the pain meds, but i'm feeling ok so far.

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Sorry for nott posting so much!

I swear, I always mean to post, but then I get distracted with other things and just completely forget to.

Things are still good here though.
Zoe loves school and had her first birthday invite this past Sunday.
We went even though DH and I both really didn't want to, but it really wasn't bad.
The parents of the boy are really nice and I could see us being friend with them if they ever wanted that.
Making friends as an adult sucks... seriously.

Anyway, the part went really well. The kids had a lot of fun just running around and playing.
Oren played a bit too much b/c he threw up shortly after we left. Oops lol.
It was so cute though. The birthday boy was the first friend Zoe talked about and when we got there, he kept telling Zoe to follow him and then suddenly "Zoe, I love you." Awwwwwwwwwwww
Kids are so darn cute and innocent and pure!

Zoe also had her first little "concert" thing at school last night. She was so darn cute up on stage with the other kindergartners. MiL, FiL, and aunt came to see it too. She finally spotted them and waved enthusiastically at them. OMG seriously... it was so cute that I actually started to tear up. Love my baby so much.

Oren is doing well, but holy crap I'm so tired of his little hissy crying fits. 3 is going to be even worse.....
I love his little ass, but good googly moogly he gets on my nerves when he starts his whining/crying tantrums. Thankfully asking him if he wants to take a nap usually gets him to calm down b/c he knows if he doesn't, I'll make him go lay down in bed.
Oh and we switched him to his toddler bed finally :)
He wasn't climbing out, but he'd climb in when he was playing with Zoe.
He's been pretty good about staying in bed so far though. Gotta enjoy that while it lasts lol.

Ezra is doing well too. Still not walking on his own, but meh.. I'm not in any hurry for it to happen. He cruises perfectly fine and he can definitely stand on his own, but he's just like Zoe was and doesn't like letting go.
He HATES going in to his carseat. We definitely have the "stiff as a board w/ a twisting action bonus" child when trying to put him in... along with some crying and screaming. UGH lol. We're still using an infant carrier with him. Keep talking about needing to buy an upgrade and then we never do.
Something always comes up and we forget.

What else.....
I'm getting my bottom wisdom teeth (the only ones I have) removed and the implant started on Friday. That's going to suck, but gotta get it done. Should've gotten it done before school started, but I just never thought about it and when it was brought up, I just procrastinated until I forgot.
Hopefully healing goes well and fast.

My birthday is tomorrow. 38.... frickin 38 years old! Mentally I certainly don't feel that old... and don't act that old lol, but physically, I feel about 80 lol.
38 though.. geeze.
Need to get back on track to losing weight. I fell off the wagon and that wagon kept on going and going and is now settled down and created a city without me. lol
I don't even know how much I weigh now. But the thing is.. I'm not THAT upset about it. It's... weird. I mean.. obviously I don't like that I fell back in to bad habits, but I'm also good... not happy that I can't fit in to some clothes once again, but.. meh. lol
Once I'm feeling better though, it's back on track to losing weight /nodnod.
Hoping that we'll be back to losing weight and getting healthy by Oct 1st :)

I'm sure there's a bunch more stuff, but I'll save that for later :D

Monday, September 11, 2017

It's all good here

Thankfully Hurricane Irma has calmed her giant ass down to tropical storm status now. We're still going to get rain, but hopefully it won't be worse than the normal summer thunder storms that go through here.
So far it hasn't been too bad.

Things have been good here though. I've been SO tired lately.
Getting up to take Zoe to school isn't so bad, but I can definitely feel it sometimes. I just NEED that extra sleep.
Thankfully school was cancelled for today so I didn't get to sleep in anyway... :\
Dog Rocco had to be kept in since it was raining and I don't trust him in the house by himself. He's still destructive as hell and I'm sure would've found something to destroy, so I had to get up once DH left. He's gonna have to be kept in tonight too since it's supposed to rain overnight. That's gonna be shitty.. probably literally.
Need to clean up the sunroom so there's nothing in there he can chew up.

Anywho... what else....
Picking up Zoe hasn't been too bad either. Thought I would hate it, but the parents that pick up their kids usually get out of the area much faster than the ones lining up in the car line to pick up.
Not sure how that will all be next year once she's let out at the same time as everyone else though. Kindergarteners are let out just a little early.

And lemme tell ya... I am one of the hot mess moms and I don't give a damn. I'd walk up and pick her up in the same outfit multiple days in a row, but I do at least change my shirt every day lol.
Some moms are up there all dressed up and pfft.. good for them for putting themselves together. Not this momma though. Lucky I even brushed my hair.
I try not to judge the other parents though... but there was one woman who was picking up her preschooler. The mom was wearing straight up booty shorts. The bottom of her flabby butt was hanging out of the shorts. SO damn inappropriate and of course she was waiting right at the front so all of the rest of us parents got a nice look at her butt.
Just come on now. What on earth are you thinking woman? Wear those somewhere else.. not to an elementary school lol. But kudos to her for being confident enough to wear them I guess lol.

So... SiLs were planning on going to Disney next year in November or October. But their grandfather thinks he's going to die soon for some reason and he wants to go so he wanted to go sooner.
So now.. the trip is set for February which means Zoe will be missing a week of school.
I mean right now it's not a big deal since it's just kindergarten, but we're still not too happy about it.
Plus the money... UUUUGH the money to go to Disney is ridiculous. Nevermind having to find someone to watch our pets. We'll probably have to board them somewhere which is going to be even more money and ugh... just ugh.

What else what else....
I don't even know. It's been so long since I posted anything that I can't remember everything that's happened lol.

Wednesday, September 6, 2017

Well crud

So school for Zoe has been going well. She's not really shy shy, but it does take her a while to open up which is what's happening. She goes silent when she's around a lot of other kids.
There's a parent teacher night tomorrow that we'll be going to so hopefully we'll get better insight on what is going on.
She seems to enjoy school though so yay :)
Getting up hasn't been too bad either. It's just the drive to school that I hate. It's right at the start of morning rush hour and the road out of the neighborhood is busy as heck. Just hate having to turn left off of it and then left on to another super busy road.

In other news... Hurricane Irma is probably going to hit us early next week. Awesome :\
Hopefully a miracle happens and it dissipates before it gets to us.
Going to go out tomorrow morning to buy more water and diapers and all that good stuff though. Can't be too prepared.

Things are good here otherwise though. House is messy as heck.. I'm tired... kids are being kids and yep... life is pretty good. Tiring and gives me a headache a lot of times... but good :)

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

First day of school

Zoe's first day of school was yesterday :)
Everything seems ok so far. She's still not wanting to go to bed early and when I got her up this morning and told her she had to get up for school, her reply to me was "again?" lol
Child.. you have at least 12 more years of school.. and then you're going to always have dreams and nightmares about it forever and ever.
Seriously.. I still have dreams about not remembering my locker combination or not doing homework. WTH?? lol

Seems like a nice school too. Only thing that's a little bad about it is that they're trying to be a "health conscious" school. I mean that's not a bad thing, but not allowing parents to make cookies or cupcakes etc for the kids or not allowing certain snacks & lunches to be sent. MEH lol
I do have to park to get Zoe. We switched her from the 5point harness carseat to the regular one. Her seat still has a back on it, it's just the regular lap and shoulder strap now. She can unbuckle herself, but she can't buckle herself in so I have to park and get her.
Not a huge deal really since not that many parents do it and the parents that park actually get out of the area quicker than the line of cars waiting to get their kids.
Also drop her off early in the morning for school breakfast.
Girl needs to eat, but her picky butt comes home saying that she's only eaten some fruit and had milk. These school lunches and breakfasts are not cheap!! lol She really needs to get over her pickiness.

She's also in a class with someone that the family knows.... but doesn't really like for some reason.
I never got the hate that the inlaws show them. They talk SO much shit about them. I hate hearing it b/c what I've seen of them.. they seem like really decent people.
Like SiL was saying that the mom always compares her child to SiL's and other kids and she'll do the same with Zoe.
Yeah... So? Pretty much all parents compare. And dogging on them for "working with" the child to get them ready for school.
Again... so? I was doing that with Zoe. Granted I wasn't doing it a lot lol... but I bought her workbooks and stuff and encouraged her to write. Nothing wrong with that.
Hell... maybe we should rag on SiL and her husband for not doing anything to prepare their child for school. I bet they wouldn't like that shit now would they??
Just get tired of them talking shit about people that don't deserve it. Just shows their insecurities.

Oh and that solar eclipse was Monday... in case anyone was living under a rock lol.
We got the full eclipse here and it was pretty darn cool.
The clouds were kept at bay at home, but unfortunately for DH, at work, it was pouring rain. Sad that he didn't get to see it, but also happy that we did.
The kids thought it was neat.
And yes... Oren is wearing a skirt b/c according to Zoe.. he was a rockstar... /shrugs lol


What else....
I have no idea lol. Just living life :)

Friday, August 11, 2017

1 year old!

So... Ezra is now one. Can't believe it's been a year already! Feels like just yesterday that I was pregnant with him.
Gosh time flew by.
Took him to his 12m appointment yesterday and his ped heard a heart murmur :(
I knew something was wrong when she was taking a bit longer checking his heart beat.
She didn't seem too concerned with it, but I'm sure that's just her training kicking in to not show any worry so the parents don't freak out, but yeah.. I freaked out internally.
We're supposed to be getting a call from a cardiologist to get him an ultrasound done to check him out. Please don't let it be anything serious :(

He's perfect though. Demanding little turd lol, but he's adorable and such a happy little long as he's not hungry lol.
He's been kind of self weaning off of formula. He only gets around 4 bottles a day now and much prefers normal food.
Just having a problem getting him to drink from a sippy cup. Need to find one that he likes so we can completely ditch the bottle.

I love the serious picture. Every time I see it.. I always hear that one song.. "Hello Darkness, My old friend...." rofl

He desperately needs a haircut. I'm gonna miss his hair though whenever that happens :( It's so crazy and awesome.

Zoe did a kindergarten sneak peak yesterday. She seemed to have fun.
Not sure how much fun she'll have when she needs to wake up before 7 though. Hell.. same here. Can't wait for her to start though. Make friends, learn, just get out of the house instead of being cooped up in here all day every day.

That's it for now. Just wanted to post about Ezra before I forgot to update.

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

MIA... sorry!

Sorry I haven't posted in a while.
Honestly, just needed a little break from posting. Nothing major has been going on. Just life as usual :)

Today is Zoe's birthday though. She has a stomach bug. Seems to hit her in the morning, but she's fine after a little while for the rest of the day.

Can't believe my baby girl is 5yo today.
Five years old. Man..... they really do grow up so fast.

We're having hers and Ezra's birthday parties on Saturday. Gave her a few of her presents today and she's getting the bigger stuff Saturday. Also letting her cousin spend the night Friday night.

Tomorrow is Ezra's birthday. I'll post some photos of him tomorrow once I take some :)
He's not walking, but he is crawling. He can crawl crawl, but he still mostly does this army crawl thing. He gets around perfectly fine. He does pull up, but not fully on to his feet yet. I think he's only done that once and that was today lol.

What else... tomorrow I have to take Zoe to her school to get a quick test thing done for her. Not sure what they're doing.
Then on Thursday, she has a short 2hour day... preview kind of thing and parents and kids have a chance at "practicing" pickup.
I know she's gonna love school and I can't wait to hear all about her days once she starts :)

Oren is great too. Not potty trained at all, but we might start soon... ish.
He's such an emotional little toddler though. MAN.... terrible twos are no joke.
And he looks up to Zoe so so much. It's the cutest watching him with her. He wants to do everything she does... and wants everything she has/wants lol.
So much whining though... So.... Much... Whining..... like right now b/c he tried to grab something Zoe was looking at and she wouldn't give it to him. Sigh... lol

DH and I are good too. Tired but good :)
He started building his shed out back and almost has it done.

I've been doing a whole lot of nothing really. Taking care of my fish tanks and trying to keep the house from looking like a total disaster... which is a struggle lol.

We're having houseguests coming to stay with us next week. It's the friends we visited in Yellowstone. They're moving and need somewhere to stay before they can go to their new place and DH volunteered our house for them to stay in.
Hope they enjoy the smell of cat pee b/c that's what the FROG smells like b/c of the stupid cat. And the sunroom smells like a giant litterbox b/c he's an idiot that scratches the wall instead of his actual litter so his poo never gets covered and ends up stinking up the whole room.
We need to invest in an automatic litterbox thing but DH doesn't want to for some damn reason.

And I think that's about it for now.
I'm sure there are a few other things I've skipped over that I'm forgetting but that can be left for another day :)

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Living life

Sorry I haven't been posting much. Just haven't felt up to it.
I think that's b/c I was unknowingly taking benadryl and woo boy it was knocking me out.
I'm not used to having allergies, so I was just taking the allergy pills that I saw on our fridge. Didn't think much of it really until DH asked which bottle I was taking it from. (they're generic fyi)....
Well when I told him, he said oh.. that's benadryl.. it makes you drowsy.

Well shit.. that explains SO much then! I had been getting SO tired after taking some. I thought it was just because, but nope... the meds were kicking in and sapping me of my energy.
So yeah.... now I know lol.
I was seriously getting concerned that my thyroid was getting all wonky or something b/c I couldn't keep my eyes open no matter what I did. So phew!

In other news... the garden is coming along :D Getting lots of cucumbers off of it and the first tomatoes are starting to finally ripen. Slowly but surely!
Pic of the kids after they helped me pick some :)

Oh and as you can see... Oren got himself a haircut!
Boy did he need it! His hair was getting so long. I loved it. He has such pretty hair, but it needed to be cut. He looks so cute with his new 'do :)

Ezra is going to need a haircut soon too.

Erm what else.... weight loss is going ok. Not the greatest atm, but I'm still in it and determined :)
I did exercise yesterday finally, but holy god my lower back couldn't take it and I'm resting today. Disappointed, but I'd rather rest than hurt myself even more.
I'm gonna get back to it tomorrow though. Hopefully it won't get any worse.

Frickin dog.. Rocco (Rocko.. however you want to spell it lol) keeps wanting to chew up my shoes and it's ticking me off!!
He's already destroyed a pair of my flip flops that were expensive and I loved them!
And he keeps taking my other shoes off of the shelves they're on. Grrrrr
Stupid hard headed puppy! lol
He is still a puppy though. He's just started to lose his puppy teeth.

I cleaned the carpets in the living room and the sunroom.
I had did half of the sunroom before, but ran out of the carpet shampoo. I finally got around to cleaning it all again and yuck. That sunroom was just straight up gross.
Our backyard is just mostly weeds and dirt and of course everyone that goes back there tracks it in. The carpet was SO discolored and stained and just bleh.
Thankfully I have my big green machine and a fresh bottle of carpet shampoo.

Here's the spot in front of the backdoor. It has an all-weather mat in front of it to try to help to keep it somewhat clean, but as you can see from the before shot.. all it does it remind us how gross the rest of the floor looks lol.

And then after. You can still see the outline of where the mat goes, but BOY does my carpet cleaner do a fantastic job!!
Love it love it love it!
I love cleaning the carpets. I love seeing the stains getting sucked up. I just hate pouring out the nasty dirty water. Plus it's SUPER loud and it scares the baby, but I think he's finally getting used to the noise it makes lol.

And what else... I still haven't finished DH's father's day gift. Oops. I was going to finish it up on Friday, but he took the day off so I couldn't work on it. It's the Tuesday after Father's day and I still haven't worked on it at all. Lol... oh well. I plan on doing it tomorrow though. He has a resident party to do after work so he won't be home until probably close to 10 or so.
Hopefully the kids wont be too needy so I can spend the day finishing it up lol

Monday, June 12, 2017

I'm so tired!

Ya know what.... being a sahm is frickin tiring. Sure.. I'm not on my feet all day and I'm not having to deal with customers or any of that other crappola that others have to do... but having to deal with a 4yo and a 2yo that are super whiny is... tiring. My soul is tired and I just want to sleep for the next week straight.

So.. what's been up?
A whole lot of nothing. That's what lol.
Oh, I did make 2 grocery bags :D Busted out the sewing machine. Figured out what was wrong with it before and cut up some of the left over fabric that DH had from work. Think we have enough for 1, maybe 2 more bags.
 Here's Zoe posing with the first one I made... and Oren getting upset b/c I didn't have another for him to model lol.

Ezra is finally crawling. It's still just army crawling right now, but he's doing it. YAY! :) I have to vacuum all the time to pick up all the little things he'll put in to his mouth, but that's the work of mom.

Kids are doing well. Whiny but well lol.

And yeah... really nothing much else has been going on lately. Just been feeling tired and worn out.

Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Are you kidding me...

So this woman in one of my mommy groups gave birth a few days ago. A home VBAC. MORON.
She just posted her birth story and I really can't with this bullshit.
She starts talking about feeling vindicated and in a different post, how this birth was a healing experience from her first one.
But she starts saying how she was getting annoyed with her midwives (nurse midwives thankfully who seemed like they knew what they were doing).... b/c they kept wanting to check the baby's vitals and were getting concerned etc.
Sounds like she was planning a water birth too which is all sorts of stupid as well, but when they broke her water (which she was also annoyed about), there was meconium in the fluids so they made her get out and called an ambulance (bc they're responsible midwives unlike the "professional" ones we have in the states).
She did push the baby out at home and thankfully baby was fine... but she couldn't deliver her placenta.
They gave her some kind of shot that I think is supposed to help deliver the placenta and of course... more annoyance at her midwives who know what the hell they're doing.
Then turns out... she had had A LOT to drink while in labor, but she hadn't peed at all so her bladder was super full which may have been causing problems. But she had refused the catheter at home and then was hesitant to get it in the hospital until she finally agreed.
Then she has the nerve to put the blame on the midwives for not realizing that she hadn't peed.
Bitch... they didn't get to you until the final hours of your labor AND you were in the pool of water. How were they supposed to know?
How about you should've taken your dumb ass to the hospital and given birth like a SANE fucking person that doesn't make birth all about some stupid "healing" experience.

I know I sound harsh and I really don't have a problem with women wanting vbacs... but a home vbac and then getting pissed off at the professionals for doing their job and not spotting a problem when.. how the hell were they supposed to know about it? FUCK OFF with that horseshit.
Just so tired of women wanting these fantasy fucking births and putting their baby and themselves at risk for a "healing" experience.

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Hmm... that was suspicious

Oh I forgot to mention.
A new Petco opened up near where my mom lives that I wanted to check out.
So we went there Saturday morning. Think we got there at around 9:30am.
It was only us, the employees and then 2 other guys came in.

We were looking around the store. DH started going crazy over some star wars themed leashes and collars for Rocko and I wandered off to look at other stuff.
I was looking at their betta fish (which were GORGEOUS and I want one! lol) and turned around to go back to DH who was now in the dog toy lane.
That's when the 2 other customers in the store decided they too needed to go over and look at the bettas. I heard one of them say something like "Oh hey, look at these fish here."
I didn't think much of it at first. That is until a minute later... there they were right behind me.. looking at the dog toys as well.
I scooted over in case I was in the way and they lingered for a moment longer.
It creeped me out but I figured it was just coincidence and chalked my reaction up to just me not being social.

That is until we left. When we got to the car... DH asked if it was just him or if those 2 guys had been following us.
Apparently, they had been following DH around as well in the store. DH didn't think anything of it at first too since they seemed to be getting a leash and collar too, but then he noticed that they kept trailing him and he could smell alcohol on one of them.

Just... yeah. It could've been coincidence of course, but they could have been following us too.
Just be aware of your surroundings folks b/c you never know.
That still bothers me though. Those 2 men could've easily have done something... especially when we weren't together in the store and Zoe and Ezra were with me (I was pushing him around in the stroller).
This is why I don't like going out by myself with the kids. Taking them out of the van and especially putting them back in. It leaves us all wide open for anyone that could want to do us harm.
Just ugh....

In lighter news....
Gymnastics today! And........ the kids are sick again.
They're acting normal, but they both have diarrhea. Oren's is especially bad. He got up at 6 and said he threw up. It was just a little bit of wetness on his pillow and blanket.
But by 10am.. I had already changed his diaper 5x b/c of diarrhea AND he threw up a few times. Just liquid and it didn't phase him at all, but it still happened.

I dunno what the hell keeps making them sick. Wish I could just douse the house in bleach to kill all the germs.

I dunno if it's something the dogs are bringing in. Or if it's something the kids keep reinfecting themselves with or what.

They're going to gymnastics though. They're not acting sick... so they're going! Will just have to make sure to wash their hands really well and keep them from putting them in their mouths. Try to keep them from getting the other children sick.

Sigh..... so.. there were about 4 days there of no sickness...... 4 days....................

Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Sorry I've been MIA!!

Woah... for some reason some of my vids have gotten a lot more views. Wonder what that is about. Maybe from spam accounts or something. /shrugs

Anyway.. sorry I've been MIA. Just living life and doing stuff :P lol
Seriously though.. it's kind of same old same old.
Kids are finally NOT sick for once. I'm sure that will change soon enough.
Dogs are sick now though.....
Rocko was the first to get the hershey squirts... now it's my Ciddy Bears turn. Poor puppers.
Rocko really didn't act sick. Just kept crapping liquefied grossness everywhere (3 times in the house).
But my Cid.... poor little pup is old and sick so he's not acting too great. Hopefully he'll feel better soon.

I've been working on my aquariums lately. Can't remember if I mentioned that already.
Almost have my 125g tank clean. It was gross and neglected before. I managed to remove all the wood from it and clean off and put back in the pieces that I wanted back in there.
Cleaned the glass of the tank and a lot of the substrate. Still need to clean the substrate some more to really make sure that most of the nastiness has been removed but overall.. it looks a thousand times better than it did before.

I didn't get a before pic of when it was still all gross. Probably wouldn't have been able to see much anyway b/c the glass was so covered in algae and gunk.
This is what it looked like after 2 cleanings and big water changes.
Still a couple of spots that needed to be cleaned but Sooooooo much better.

Yesterday, I started on the 55 gal. It's a tank that used to be my mom's but she got rid of it and gave it to me. It's over 20 years old. It's eventually going to be taken down too. But it's staying up for now to be used as a quarantine tank for when we start getting more fish for the big tank.
Anyway.. yesterday... I started taking out a couple of the plants. I had just intended on taking a few out and maybe trying to catch a couple of the plecos in it to move to the big tank. But it turned in to me pulling up all but 2 of the plants and catching all of the plecos. lol
That tank was gross though. It was SO overgrown with an underwater moss that trapped all of the gross gunk in it.
I need to do a few more water changes in it before we start buying more fish. It currently only has one little platy in there. Don't want to move it to the big tank b/c I'm afraid the current fish in the big tank would pester it to death.
Anyway... here's the big tank now. Looks a bit scraggly with all the plants from the 55 in it.
I need to rearrange just a little and I'm getting a few more plants in the mail this week.
DH surprised me and let me buy some new LED lights for it. Should be getting that next week :D
I'm so excited to get back in to the hobby.
It's not a cheap hobby, but it will be nice to have a big beautiful tank again.
I just can't get lazy with it like I did before.

I let the kids play outside the other day. Think it was Saturday.
Our water bill is going to be SO high! lol
Worth it though :)

And finally for now.
Kids start gymnastics tomorrow!! So excited for it. Need to wash Zoe's leotards. She could just wear shorts and a shirt though. They don't have a dresscode or anything other than no shoes in the gymnastics area.
Really hope they both enjoy it and really hope Ezra behaves while they're in their classes. Also hoping they both behave while they wait too. Oren's is first, then Zoe's.
I know she's gonna be super anxious so go start her class when we get there lol.

Oh yeah.. diet was a bit blah this weekend, but it's back on track now :)
I'm not letting some minor setbacks get me back in to poor food choices.
Cheats are gonna happen, but that's part of this whole process and I'm done disappointing myself.
This time next year... I'm gonna be thinner and I'm not going to look back and wish I had stuck with it.

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

It's my turn now

I threw up in the middle of the night.
Woke up and felt nauseous. Tried ignoring it and going back to sleep, but no. I had to puke
Thing is though... there wasn't much of anything in my stomach so I didn't throw up a lot.
Just glad that this isn't a bad stomach bug. Annoying as shit, but not anywhere near as bad as that last one that completely sapped your energy.

Zoe still has gross poo and so does Oren now. Well.. he actually threw up last night in his sleep too and he's had gross diarrhea all day today. Super stank, watery, but also grainy?

Ezra and DH seem to be the only ones that have been spared from this so far. Hopefully they won't get sick.

DH came home at 9 last night. I was pissed off b/c he didn't see the kids all day. I know he sensed it b/c he kept asking me if I was.. and I kept saying no lol. I mean.. there really wasn't a reason for me to be mad. Sigh.. I hate it when I feel like that. Just unreasonably mad or mad at something stupid.
I'm over it now and obviously I'm feeling a bit guilty about it. Damn emotions! lol

Oh at the Sunday thing at church.. this woman had the cutest little baby girl ever. I dunno how old she was... maybe 4 or 5 months? Still really young and tiny and so GD cute and chunky!
Holy crap it gave me some serious baby fever. How ridiculous is that though? I still have a baby!! rofl
It just made me long for another girl though. Sigh...
Seriously.. getting my tubes tied was totally the right decision, but I think I'm still going to mourn not being able to have anymore for a little while longer.

And that's all for now. It's raining pretty good and I want to post this in case we lose power.

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Seriously... again?

Zoe is sick.. again. Well, both her and Oren are with a stomach bug.. AGAIN.
So tired of this crap......

Oh.. AND... Rocko has the squirts and proceeded to go in to the hallway that leads to the kids' rooms and blast a dook all over the floor and wall. Without warning I might add. He's still a puppy, but GD is it annoying as hell that he's not house trained yet.
Like he'll go out for an hour.... 15mins back inside and he's already pissed and/or shit. Yesterday.. it was exactly that. I look in the sunroom and there he is.. just hunched over taking a crap.

Thankfully poo is easy to clean, but it's still disgusting and there's always residue or at least you think there could be so that just makes it grosser when the kids or yourself have to walk in the area.

Ezra is good though. Still not crawling, but not worried....
Ok I am worried a little bit, but also not.
He gets on his stomach and just rotates on his stomach and scoots backwards lol. I think he thinks that's enough. He's only ever gotten on to his knees a couple of times, but not hands and knees. /shrugs
Hopefully there isn't a problem.

DH has gone off to a work BBQ thing. Yeah... I didn't want to go and have no regrets about it!
But then he's making me go to some church BBQ thing tomorrow and a birthday party on Sunday /grumble
What the hell???
We don't get invited to shit and then all of a sudden, all of this crap all at once!

So yeah... a whole mess load of cheats this week and I am not happy with it.
I'm sure my weigh in won't be great.

I'm not really happy with DH right now either.
So he volunteered at the church Awana program. That's fine.. I didn't mind at all.
But then to hear how he's some of the kids' male kind of father figure and how they look up to him etc.... ok.. that's all well and good and I'm glad he can do that.
But then when he's home... he's just annoyed and frustrated and has a super short fuse with our kids.
He's a great dad most of the time, it's just recently I've noticed his annoyance and then to hear someone talk about him like that towards other children just annoyed me is all.
I dunno... just feels like lately our kids have only been getting the annoyed mean daddy that only gets to see them a couple of hours before they go to bed.

Ugh.. I don't want to paint him as a horrible father b/c he's not. He's SO far from being a bad dad. Hell.. I have my weeks of being in a shit mood too and yelling a bit more than I should. I'm just venting. Need to clear that up before anyone thinks he's some horrible person. lol

There was something else but I've forgotten b/c Zoe just drew on the carpet with chalk.
Chalk.. think it's easy to get out of carpet right? Yeah... no. Sigh........ -_-

Thursday, May 18, 2017

Sick gross nasty!

That's been the theme in this house the last couple of days lol.

Thankfully this stomach bug has been pretty mild for the kids. Poor Oren has gotten it again? Or it didn't completely go away for him just yet. He's acting totally normal.. just has disgusting poop and threw up on his bed again. Gross poop that leaked out. BLEH!

I hope I don't get sick too. Thankfully I've avoided it for now. I'm sure all of the extra hand washing I've been needing to do has helped.

Diet is going well, but I dunno if my weigh in tomorrow will reflect it since I still have the appetite of a starving elephant.

I'm finally going to try to exercise today. Just something light.
Saw someone post a video for beginners yoga that I'm going to try out.
I am still spotting right now.
Stupid period can't make up it's mind if it wants to continue or stop.
Really really hoping that when I do start losing more weight... this fixes.
Would love nice predictable periods.
Grr, my stupid weak nails keep breaking! And breaking too low. WTH??
Trying to keep my right pinky nail from coming completely off right now b/c it broke down super low. Just one day.. felt a bruise like pain coming from the finger and noticed the break. It just needs to grow out a little more then I'll clip it.
Sigh.. so much for having nice pretty long strong nails.

Ezra still isn't crying but he's rolling on to his stomach all the time... and then spinning in place lol.
It's funny but also annoying b/c he hasn't figured out that he can roll back to his back so he gets upset during the night and starts fussing until we go in to his room and roll him back over lol. Lazy child!

And yep... nothing much has really happened this week. Just dealing with sick kids and trying not to get sick myself.
I did manage to clean the carpets on Monday... but you sure as heck wouldn't be able to tell I did any cleaning with how messy it already is. I don't know how they do it. lol

Monday, May 15, 2017

It's 4am

And I'm in the living room and Zoe is on the couch sleeping.
Why? B/c she crawled in to bed with us... and threw up all over my back. Lol.. poor girl.
She was sick this morning too.
Thought she had gotten over it but I guess whatever caused earlier is still in her system.
I need to clean the carpets. I know these nasty dirty ass carpets aren't helping matters. Kids playing all over the spots that the dog has messed on. We spray the spots and clean up as best we can, but I still need to get the carpet cleaner out later.

So yeah..... fun times....

Mother's day was like any other here. I didn't have to cook which was a plus lol.
We went to inlaws for dinner. They did a shrimp boil which was really good.
Ate too many carbs today, but meh.. I'm not going to worry about it.
An extra cheat isn't going to derail me from losing weight :D

Didn't get anything though. I'm not one to expect flowers or anything expensive or some shit, but it would've been nice if DH actually tried to get the kids to make me something... or get a card for them to scribble in for me. Oh well... not a big deal and have lots more mother's days to get some homemade goodies from the kids :)

Uuuugh.... I'm already feeling like a zombie. Today is going to be a struggle.
The life of mom....

Friday, May 12, 2017

My garden!

Just a quick post.....
My garden is doing... pretty well.
I wish these rogue tomato plants hadn't completely taken over my peppers, but they're doing well and I can't argue with getting more tomatoes :D

It's holding up pretty good though so far.
The weather has gotten back to being hot so I'll have to water a lot more often, especially when they get bigger.
Already picked off 2 tiny caterpillars. Not hornworm thankfully, but still little bastards that could do damage.
I can't wait to have a successful garden again!

Zoe and Oren start their gymnastics class June 1st! WOO! DH called them last night and put them on the list. YAY :D
I'm so excited for them. I really hope they enjoy it. Would love for them to stick with it too. Not to be professional or anything, but mostly for the fitness and socialization.

My weight this morning is officially 219.4
So yeah.... a slight loss, but I'll take it. I thought it was going to be a few pounds gained with how bloated I am.
I'm probably less than this b/c I can still feel all of that food and waste in there taking its sweet time coming out. Oh well.... 219.4... I will gladly take it :D

I still don't know what the hell I ate to cause this. Maybe it's just hormonal that is causing it. /shrugs

Thursday, May 11, 2017

I made a mistake!

So.. b/c I'm PMSing.. I've become a bottomless pit. Or well... it feels like it at least.
So yesterday.. I ate... and ate... and ate some more. Welp, there is a bottom and I hit it. I hit it HARD and painfully!
I felt totally fine before dinner.
Dinner was just a fruit smoothie as we decided to do on Wednesday nights since DH and Zoe have Awana to go to.
I felt fine eating the smoothie.
5 mins after the smoothie and I am doubled over in painful stomach cramps.
It's like everything I had eaten was still in my stomach and the smoothie came in and just congealed it on in to a giant ball of suck.
Holy crap the pain.
I'm still in pain today too. Not cramping thankfully, but my stomach hurts to press down on and I'm pretty sure I can feel where this giant turd is currently at in my intestines b/c I will sometimes get a wave of pain from specific spots.
I dunno WTF happened with all of this.. but it was a huge mistake to give in to my pms hormonal need for feed.

I didn't learn anything though b/c here I sit... eating eating eating some more today.
I just can't help it. Even though my stomach still hurts.. I'm HUNGRY.
I did down a glass of water w/ miralax in it so I'm hoping it helps to get all of this out of me. I would take an actual laxative if we had some.
Wish we had prunes b/c I'd eat some of those too.

Do not expect my weigh in tomorrow to be good, but we'll see I guess. Sigh. I just want to poop.

Just got word from DH that we finally got an email back from gymnastics and they're going to have an opening in the time slot we wanted in June. Geeze. Well.. better late than never I guess.
Just have to make sure the time for Oren is still open and then confirm that we want the spot :D
I already ordered her 2 leotards and 2 shorts to go with them. Will be getting those soon.
So excited for her to start.
Yesterday she got on the floor and.. I didn't know WTH she was doing, but she just had this sheepish smile on her face as she kind of tried to do a split and she said she was "doing gymnastics" lol. Awwwwww
She's so excited to start and I can't wait until she does :D

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Well that explains a lot.

I guess my period is starting.
Started spotting brown yesterday and it's gotten a little heavier today. Still just spotty and still brown which is kind of gross. I mean it doesn't smell or anything.. that would be a whole other problem and issue I'd need to call a doctor about lol. It's just kind of gross when you see that old brown blood coming out.

Boy... I share a lot huh ;) lol

Ezra is great. He got one shot yesterday and from the sounds of it... his doctor isn't that concerned about not crawling yet, but will be if he's still not crawling by 12m which I'd be concerned with too. Said that they would do some kind of tests then if he still wasn't crawling and/or walking by then.
I don't think we have anything to worry about. I think with doing more tummy time now, he'll be crawling soon. He still doesn't like tummy time a lot but we're doing it a lot more.

He's 20lbs, 28 1/2 inches, and his head is 46.5. Him and Oren both have HUGE craniums lol.

zoe <--- zoe types that out lol

Crap.. I forgot what else I wanted to talk about. Dangit!

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Rebellious toddlers

Oren is driving me crazy with his Nuh Uhs and Nos and ..... just UGH I don't think so child.
He tries to do the passive aggressive slug flop on to the ground now too and that crap isn't gonna work little dude.
His temper also makes him toss/throw stuff when he gets upset. Yeah.. not gonna fly. If I catch him doing it, I make him pick it up and put it up. He tried pulling that crap with me and then he ran off to scream/cry. Nope.. off to bed with you to take a nap... or cry in your crib until I feel like getting you out of it.

10mins later:

Thankfully he went to sleep.

He can be so warm and snuggly and adorable, but when he gets in to one of his toddler moods... cover your ears and muster up as much patience as you can lol.

Ezra has his 9m appointment this afternoon. I'm sure he's getting more shots. He always seems to do well with them so I'm not too worried. Just worried that DH wants me to take him. Ha.. nope. I spend all day with the kids.. he can take them to their appointments.

He cut one of his front teeth :D I'm sure the one next to it will be through soon. Overall, he's been pretty ok with teething.
A few nights of being restless, but overall he's handling it great. Thank goodness!

He's also getting up on to his knees finally. He hasn't figured out getting on to all 4's so he steadies himself by using his head pressed up against the floor lol.
I'm sure he'll get it soon though :)

Frickin puppy and the chihuahua do not get a long.
The puppy is a typical high energy puppy and he's hard headed too. We get him to stop pestering the chihuahua when we see it happen, but we don't always catch it.
The chihuahua is your typical chihuahua with a complex and has started to guard his food b/c he doesn't eat it all in one go and gets distracted so the other dogs and even the cat will come along and eat the rest of his food. Well he doesn't like it when the puppy does it so will snap at him. Puppy had enough of that one day and pinned the chihuahua on the floor. Didn't hurt him and didn't look like he was trying to bite him, but it was definitely a show of dominance.
We of course separated them ASAP.
Sigh.. just frustrating. They're both good dogs in their own way and hopefully the chihuahua will come around.
Our other doggo plays with him now. He'll get annoyed too and will put the pup in his place, but thankfully he's come around and has accepted him.

The cat also can't stand the puppy and will start growling and hissing at him. For some reason that just annoys the crap out of me. I could see if the pup deserved it... which he does sometimes, but not just walking by.

I think once Rocko calms his butt down some, the other 2 will accept him more :)

Just so tired right now. Just went to the bathroom and wiped away a couple of small globs of dark brown grossness. So yeah... think maybe my period may be starting soon which would explain why I'm so damn tired.

Thankfully my cold is finally letting up and I'm not coughing so much, but the kids are starting to get sick so I'm sure I'll be sick again in a couple of weeks. SIGH!
Need to just lysol everything and hope we kill this cycle of sickness.

Monday, May 8, 2017

Is it the weekend yet?

Can't leave the backdoor open any longer.Not sure if Ezra got out on his own or if he had a little help from Oren, but I suddenly hear a couple of thumps immediately followed by Ezra crying.
I don't think I've ever gotten up as quick as I did. I rushed to the back door and he's at the bottom of the porch, upside down in his walker. My heart stopped.
He scraped under his chin and his leg a little bit, but he's fine other than that.
He's never been able to get over the lip that leads outside so just never thought twice about him going to the back door.
Sigh.... I feel so horrible about it and this could've ended so much worse.
Seriously lucky that he didn't hurt himself more. And thank goodness that it is only 2 steps down.


Zoe has slept in her bed for 3 nights. Last night she came in to our bed at around 330. I did kinda miss her. I loved not being on the edge of the bed constantly but I did miss the snuggles. She's not normally snuggly and doesn't really like hugs, so I take what I can get from her lol. She's only going to be this little for so long. Gotta enjoy it before it's too late.. ya know?
I can sacrifice some bed space if it means I get to snuggle with my baby girl :)

Oren is going to give me a heartattack too. Well.. that's if my head doesn't explode from the whining first.
He was out back.. on top of the picnic table with Rocko... the puppy. WTH?
Him and Zoe always get on top of that table and start playing around and UUUUUUGH... I hate it. I always tell them to get down but back up they go when I'm not looking.

He's just starting to get colors. He mostly says blue, but he'll repeat the color word if we say it to him. So darn cute!

Still no word from the gymnastics place. DH said they said the end of May. BLEH! Was hoping it would be sooner, but oh well... end of May is at least something. Just keeping FX that she will get in to that time slot so we can finally get them in all of it.
Zoe needs more interactions with authority figures and children and Oren just needs more social interactions that isn't just us.
I'm just happy that Zoe isn't really shy. She can get shy, but she's not like how I was. I was painfully shy and still am actually lol.
Just don't want that for my kids. Want them to be able to be social and make lots of good friends.

Guess that's all for now. I'm so tired that I can't remember if there was something else I wanted to mention. It's only Monday and I'm already looking forward to this weekend.... sigh.

Friday, May 5, 2017

Playdoh... UGH!!!

So, it was nice out yesterday so I let the kids play out back for a little bit. Zoe spotted the playdoh that we bought for Oren's birthday and wanted it. Ok.. they're going outside so.. it's all good right?
Yeah.... I knew... I knew it was going to be brought in and it sure was.
There are now chunks of playdoh everywhere. Small pieces ground in to the carpet that will never be gotten up again.
I HAD to clean up yesterday b/c I had to vacuum up as much as possible before too much got stuck in the carpet. Sigh....
But hey... it's clean-ish now so that's good. :D
There are already toys and mess on the floor... so it was nice while it lasted I guess..... sigh.

My official weigh ins are going to be Friday mornings I think. I don't want to wait until tomorrow or Sunday to do it since of the cheat dinner. I know that's going to cause me to gain some bloat back temporarily so I want to weigh before cheating.

This morning... I was down to 219.6
Woot :)
Still hoping to start exercising on Monday, but this cough is being stubborn as shit and not wanting to leave.
It's not as juicy as before thankfully so FX I keep getting better.

It's pretty crazy though. I can already see an actual difference in my stomach. I mean.. I still look like I'm pregnant, but not AS pregnant ;) hehe
Just have a great feeling that adding in exercise will definitely help get even better results. So pumped and ready!

DH and I were pining for some carby food though. Like creamy macaroni salad. Yum that sounds so good lol. Lol.. that's kinda funny. We're not craving sweets... we just want the carbs. All the carbs!! :P
I think we could probably share some popcorn every once in a while and still be on track. We'll see :)

Thursday, May 4, 2017

How... HOW??

I cleaned up and now?? Doesn't even look like I bother cleaning... EVER.
How on earth do 2 little children... so small.... so innocent? Create so much damn chaos???
And then we're gonna have a 3rd joining in on the fun soon. UUUUUGH!
I'm not even cleaning shit right now. I don't feel like it b/c I had to wake up early again today so F it. F the mess. It's not going anywhere.
Oh it's driving me bonkers looking at it, but it can wait. I just don't have the motivation to do anything about it right now.

I'm still horking up a lung. Not as much but still as violently as before. I pee myself so much. It's only a little bit, but little bit.... a lot... it's still too much.

It's supposed to get to 65 degrees tomorrow. WTF nature?? Now... I'm not complaining that it's getting cool. I love that part... but still... WTF?? Make up your GD mind. It was 90 when we went to the fair this past weekend!
Hopefully my garden will be ok. It should be, but they may slow down their growth some since the temp will be cool for the next few days.
Hey.. good for us though. Can open up the windows and enjoy some nice weather before it gets Satan's ballsack hot.

You know how FB has that share past memories thing? I shared one when Oren was a little baby. Feels like a thousand years ago.
He was such a cute ass little baby!
Don't get me wrong, he's a cute ass little toddler now lol, but OMG his cheeks when he was a bebeh were so squishy cute!
/cry I'm already missing the baby stage and Ezra is still in it :(
I'm going to miss the super chunky baby-ness. The baby babble. The pure innocence and cuteness. Sigh....

Diet is going well.
I did get SUPER hungry yesterday at dinner. It was b/c we had smoothies. Smoothies rarely fills me up.
Oh it's delicious, but not filling.
So I snacked on what I could... which wasn't much. Boo :(
Fixed some yummy fatty BBQ pork ribs for lunch. Could only eat a few of them b/c they're so fatty and heavy on the stomach.
About to go eat a pickle b/c I'm still feeling a bit blah from the fattiness just sitting in my stomach.
It was good though. :D

Tonight is going to be some left over sriracha chicken breast with salad. Yum yum :D

Hoping pineapple is on sale somewhere this week. Been craving some for a few days now.
We bought 2 a few weeks ago, but they go bad so quick. Or well.. the ones we bought did. Boo :(

I think that's it for now.
DH emailed back the HOA saying he was going to put siding on his shed so they approved our application. Morons. He was already planning on putting wooden siding on it (one of the HOA requirements for the shed) and painting it to be the same color as the house. Dunno why that's not enough.
He said he's going to just go ahead and do that, but knowing him, he's probably going to just do the siding.
I'm sure he's just happy to finally be able to get it started already. We have 2 months to get it up from the time it's approved and he wants to do it all himself.
He's got his work cut out since he's never built anything like that before lol.

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Woot! A Small Victory!!

So... early start this morning b/c Oren leaked all over his bed at 4am.
He didn't understand that it was still sleepy time and screamed and screamed when I put him back to bed. Thankfully, I can just turn his monitor off so I didn't have to hear it, but I did stay awake until he finally went back to sleep an hour later.
Then DH got up and I got another hour of sleep before he woke up again.

Anywho... while I was thinking of it... decided to pull out my first pair of bottoms that I want to get back in to.
They're size 16. Nothing special... just shorts. There's no give or anything in the waist and they're pretty true to size. Like they're not labelled size 16 but run big or smaller.
Went to put them on to see how much I needed to lose before being able to button them up. Got a bit disheartened when the shorts got tight around my hips. That's usually never been a problem. Anyway.....
I could button them!! They were a little snug and I had some serious muffin top spilling over, but I could button and zip them without feeling like I was cutting off circulation! WOOOO!!!

So once Zoe is awake, I'm gonna go find a different pair of bottoms to be my next goal :)
I could still use these shorts and have a goal of.... no snuggness or no muffin top. I may still do that :)

I still have a LOOOOONG journey ahead, but it's nice to have this small victory to keep me going :D

It would just be nice to one day not look like I'm about ready to give birth to another child. I know carrying so much fat in the stomach area is not healthy for anyone and that is where I carry a ton of it. I'm not quite an apple top b/c I do have some booty and thighs too, but most of it is up top.

But yeah... this really helps to keep me motivated and I want to continue on. Again.. having all of our meals planned out has helped SO SO SO SO much!
I am craving sweet a little bit, but I fixed some sugar free jello so hopefully that helps. I fixed some pudding too, but it is very carby so I only had a spoonful and gave the kids the rest.

Really hoping that next week I'll be able to exercise. I know as soon as I do start exercising, I'll be seeing even more results and it will be so much healthier. Just have to get rid of this damn cough already.
I feel ok overall, but I still have a pretty juicy cough and my ears have been deciding which one is going to get all stuffed up and muffled. Yesterday it was my right one :\
Zoe's cough last night when she got in to bed with us sounded pretty juicy too. Ugh. FX that it doesn't get worse.

And garden stuff! WOO! lol

Did a little bit of gardening yesterday. Planted my onion scraps outside. If you keep the root part of an onion, you can plant it and it will grow. It won't become a giant big onion, but you can cut off the green part and use it like green onion :D
Oh and my avocado seed finally split and is growing roots :D WOO! Have a large pot just waiting for it :)

We had some leftover russet potatoes that weren't good any longer but were starting to grow. Decided to cut them up and plant some of them. Never tried growing potato so we'll see how this goes lol.
I dunno what it is, but it always grosses me out when potatoes do this. 

My cucumbers. The one on the bottom is the one I grew from seed and then the bunch above that is what I bought from Walmart. I should've separated the bunch, but meh.. not worried about it. Just glad they're finally growing. This particular bed also has my tomato plants in it :)

My pepper plants bed. Or well.. it's supposed to be. We used all of the compost we had made and apparently it had some viable tomato seeds in it b/c they popped up and are taking over. Was going to move the tomatoes, but since they're doing so well.. I think I'm going to move the peppers instead.

Annoying cute Rocko lol. He's gotten SO big! Still a puppy.. still has some annoying behaviors that need to be taken care of. Tired of picking up poop or having to worry about him peeing everywhere still. It's getting better, but just wish it happened faster lol.
I love puppies, but dang are they a lot of work :P
He's such a smart little guy though. Really responds to treats. He'll sit without a treat, but down and anything else requires a treat still hehe

This small area has 3 pumpkin plants. They're not doing that well. Think it was just shock and now... I dunno. Just not doing well for some reason. I'm not worried about it. Just wanted to grow them for Zoe. Thought she'd get a kick out of watching a little pumpkin grow.
We are getting some raspberry plants coming up though. DH wants to pull them up, but I won't let him. lol

I let the kids help plant the potatoes and help me pull weeds :)

 Ezra was asleep during all of that, so here's a photo of him from the previous day.
Trying to do a lot more tummy time with him. He can go in circles, but that's about it :P