Tuesday, February 14, 2017

The bad part no one wants to admit to

... So that last post was pretty bitchy. Damn... I was trying to get to sleep last night and all I could think about was how mean I was.
I could delete it, but, no. I 'said' it... I own up to how mean I can be sometimes.
Try not to be, but sometimes.. something finally just rubs you the wrong way and all hell breaks loose.

Speaking of mean....
That part of parenthood that no one wants to admit to... getting pissed off at your kids.
Not talking about frustration.. I'm talking about ANGER.
I'm sure there will be some that deny ever getting angry, but they're GD liars.
Oh.. I feel guilty AF immediately after getting angry and I would never ever abuse my kids (and before anyone says it, no.. I do not think the occasional spank is abuse, so fuck off with that shit).

I got angry at Ezra this morning. He started fussing at around 3am. Would... not... stop. I started off fine, but after getting up non stop with him until 6am (and trying to let him CIO but he wouldn't calm down).. I was done and yes.. my anger was aimed towards him.
My anger came out as a few "Shut up" and "For fuck's sake!" under my breath and a few throwing the blankets off myself like a child, but that was it.
I felt bad and feel bad that I got angry, but... it happened. You'll never see my big ass on the news though b/c I'm not a psycho that would hurt my kids.

I think us parents need to give ourselves a break sometimes. Acknowledge that we're all human and we still have feelings. We love our kids more than anything, but they can royally piss us off. That it's a normal part of raising a little human or 3.
But no... we can't admit it b/c you'll have all the lying ass sanctimommies that come out to proclaim how horrible you are and that you never should've had kids if you're not gazing at them 24/7 with nothing but googly eyed wonderment or some shit. Bitches that have to make you feel like shit b/c it makes them feel better.
Bullies.... just bullies.

So here is my little Ez's head full of cradle cap. If you're not familiar with cradle cap.. just imagine having the worst case of dandruff ever.
Just a super dry scalp that is difficult to get rid of and leaves giant chunk of flaked off skin in your hair.

This was after I put some more baby lotion on his head. After I took the pic, I went and combed his hair out and massaged some of the flakes off. It's so gross. He has it worse than the other 2 did.
I know Zoe had it pretty bad in patches.... I can't really remember Oren having it bad or for very long though.
Hopefully w/ the lotioning and combing, it will help to clear it up quickly.
He's still my little cutey pie though.

And my little miss 4yo going on to 16. Attitude attitude attitude lol
Even with all of that attitude... she's such a wonderful child. Sure... she has her shitty moments lol, but I think we're pretty lucky to have such a great kid :D
Just wish she would stay in her bed at night.... and wipe her own butt :P lol
Need to go to Once Upon a Child. We went to Kohls on Friday after dinner (it's in the same lot as the restaurant) to use some Kohl's cash. Bought the boys matching outfits and just need to get Zoe a dress that kinda matches them too.
They did have GORGEOUS super expensive Beauty & The Beast "inspired" dresses there. Just super adorable little girl dresses that I would've loved to have gotten her.. if they just weren't so GD expensive lol.
I'm sure we'll be able to find her something just as great 2nd hand and at a fraction of the cost at OUaC though :D

And a terrible pic of Oren b/c my camera's flash is broken... awesome. Probably a good thing it's bad though b/c he's still sick and almost always has a river of snot coming out of his nose. Ew
Speaking of sick... DH caught their cold. So far, my nose has been a little stuffed up, but that's been it for me. I have gotten a couple of headaches, but I think that's hormonal.
DH though has a mild cold. 
Thank goodness for his cpap machine b/c since he's gotten it... NO SNORING! WOOOOO!
He's still not used to sleeping with it just yet, but it will get better with time.
I remember what his breathing and snoring was like when he's sick..... now that he has his cpap... that's all history. Sweet sweet history that I hope never happens again lol.
F you snoring!!!!! No one is gonna miss you!! MUAHAHAHAHA

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