Friday, August 31, 2012

The twins

This is so vain, but one of the only things I enjoy about having to pump (other than giving baby food).... I absolutely LOVE how big my boobs have gotten lol.
I actually look proportionate now.
They weren't exactly small before or anything, but now... I dunno, they are just looking so good in shirts lol.
They hurt every once in a while and feel super heavy in the middle of the night when I wake with Zoe, but it's totally worth it right now! rofl
I hope they stay this big... or at least a little larger than they were before :P
____

Got in a fantastic nap yesterday. Not sure how long it was and I def could've slept longer, but Zoe was squirming and needed to be woken up to get changed and eat.
She did have some trouble getting to sleep last night though. She just didn't want to stay asleep. I stayed up with her a bit... think I finally got her to go to sleep at 11pm. I know that's not terrible or anything, but when I've been going to bed at 8:30-9.... that's late :P heh

She's not pooing as much as she was, but when she goes... BLEH! lol
____

193lbs today. WOO! Hope it keeps going down or at least stays put.

Things at the c-sec incision are still aching a little. It's not terrible... more annoying than anything b/c I just want it to go away already. Think the hair growing back in is irritating the spot too which sucks b/c it's making it itchy and I've been kinda afraid to touch the area lol.
I have touched it.... very very gently. It feels weird.. almost numb.
____

Alrighty, Zoe has been asleep for a while... gonna see if I can get in a few winks before she wakes again.
Oh and Zoe is now wearing her 0-3m clothes very well now. Haven't even tried putting her in one of the tiny NB sizes again b/c I know she's gonna be too big for it. Gosh.. they grow so fast!

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Swaddling

Swaddled Zoe last night again and while she did struggle at first, she calmed right down and went to sleep.
Unswaddled, she'd wake me up constantly with various noises at night she would make.
Last night, she barely made a peep, plus swaddling her seems to allow her to roll on to her side which she seems to really like lol.

So WOO! YAY swaddling! lol Thanks everyone for suggesting it.
She's still not going right to sleep but swaddling does seem to help keep her asleep though for the most part.

And saved the video of the other swaddling technique just in case her swaddleme blankets don't seem to be doing the trick any longer.

Alrighty, have to go pump and maybe go back to sleep for a bit.

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

All advice is welcome!

Wanted to post really quick while DH is home (he's going out to friend's house.. yes.. with my blessing lol)...

Seriously, I appreciate all the advice given. New parent... I have no idea what I'm doing so hearing experiences from veterans helps a bunch.

We tried swaddling her again the other night and she absolutely hated having her arms imobile. She struggled against the blanket and just looked miserable not being able to move.
May try it again and just stick to it though if it helps any.
She hasn't slept well again today either. May be a growth spurt though b/c each time she wakes, she wants to eat.
I got in a whopping 5min nap :P lol

And yep... I do love the wipes warmer! heh Only complaint is that since the wipes are wet.. they cool off VERY quickly so ya gotta hurry to use them before they make baby's butt cold again ;)

3 weeks old

Wow.... it's only been 3 weeks? Geeze, feels like no time at all and also forever at the same time. Weird.

Still though, one more week and she'll be a month old O_O... good lord a month goes by quickly!

Hmmm, what's been going on.

Not sure what is going on with Zoe and her sleeping right now.
She'll drift off to sleep and then a minute later will wake up. Most of the time if we're still holding her, she'll drift back off to sleep, wake a few more times until finally going to sleep. But if she's been laid down or some of the times when we're holding her, she'll wake up crying.

She's been doing this the past 2 days. I know she has to be so tired from it b/c I can't imagine she's getting good rest from waking like that constantly.

She seems to have her night time schedule down... at least for now. She wakes up around 3am, usually goes right back to sleep after eating, wakes again around 6am. Stays up a little bit, usually back in bed before 7, then sleeps until 9.
I can't wait for her to sleep through the night, but I can't really complain too much about this arrangement though. I'm usually not left feeling too tired each time she wakes so yay for that.
Worried about her 3am time though. Had a slight problem last night. I'll change her, feed her, hold her until I'm sure she's ready to go back to sleep and then put her in her bassinet and go pump after.
I did that last night and she started to fuss and woke DH up. DH was only up for 5mins and went right back to sleep lol, but still, it made me feel bad that she couldn't get back to sleep without fussing and that it woke him up. SIGH *shrugs* We'll see what happens tonight.

I'm still pretty weepy. Not depressed or anything like that thankfully, but I could cry at the drop of a hat at certain things.

I was down to 192 this morning. Not sure how that happened since I'm still eating like crud. Not sure how to remedy that right now since I have to rush to eat anything just in case she wakes up lol.
Want to go to the store, or get DH to go for me to pick up quick foods like ramen, sandwich stuff, more cereal etc. Things I can prepare and eat in a hurry. It's not going to be like this for forever. Already wanting to go back to eating like I did with the gestational diabetes (just not as strict w/ the carbs and sugar)... Still eating enough for the breastmilk supply but good stuff to help me lose weight as well or at least not gain anything.

Anywho, sounds like Zoe is finally settled... gotta go pump and maybe get in a few snoozes before she wakes up :)

Taken just an hour ago. She doesn't really interact with the toys and such yet though.
Frickin LOVE the onesie she's in. I know it's boyish, but it's adorable. Bought it at that consignment thing I went to before finding out the gender heh.
Think that's supposed to happen again soon.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Rough but ok.

Man oh man. Not sure what is going on with Zoe but she didn't really nap for any extended length of time yesterday.
She would keep drifting off and then 2-5mins later would wake up again.
The longest she slept was when I made the blog post and that was about hmm... 30mins.
She was def tired and yawning all day but I guess just couldn't get to sleep. Poor baby.

I was doing well until 8pm hit. I wanted to go to bed but stayed up to pump at 9. And of course DH wanted to go to bed then and wanted to leave baby with me. Seriously dude?
I stayed up because HE made a stink about me not pumping on a stricter schedule and then HE wants to leave Zoe with me while I'm pumping. Yeah, I get he's tired and worked all day, but WTF did I do all day? Def wasn't sitting around the house with a thumb up my ass.
Anyway, I glared at him good and hard and he got the point :P lol

Gotta make this quicker b/c Zoe is having difficulties napping again it seems :(

Speaking of DH, it's like someone has lit a fire under his balls. He can not take his hands off of me and is seriously counting down the days until my 6w appointment LOL.
The idea of not being able to DTD is making him extra interested in it for some reason. Sigh....
I have almost no interest in it right now b/c I'm still bleeding. It's not heavy or anything but any bleeding usually just saps away any libido.
Bleeding is annoying and I wish it would stop already. It teases me. It will be like it's going away, and then BAM it will pick back up. It's not heavy or anything, more like a light period when it does pick up, but still... BLEH!

Pumping SUCKS. There I said it!
It feels like I'm living life 2-3hrs at a time.
The last couple of days I haven't pumped regularly. I mean I did but it wasn't every 2 hours and my supply is paying for it right now. I hate that I can't even have a frickin day without it causing problems with my supply :(
I'l keep on it though b/c I know Zoe is getting some benefit from the milk I am pumping. Just wish it wasn't so damn tedious and fickle.

Zoe had an appointment yesterday. She's up to 8lbs 11oz and 21inches long! O_O My big girl :D
Everything looked great with her though and she got her first vaccination shot. She did not like that and neither did I. I started to tear up when she cried.

Erm what else....

I miss being pregnant. I don't miss the discomforts, but everything else.... I miss it. Miss the big baby bump, miss feeling her squirming around in there... sigh.... I can't wait to have another! heh

Had something else I wanted to mention, but I forgot.... so instead.... Zoe photos!


In her cute footie PJs. Yes it's frickin adorable, but a pain. This one is NB size and she's already almost too big for it.

My brother and his wife were supposed to come over this day which is why I put her in this onesie. They didn't show but oh welp.

Zoe catching some quick snoozes in the carseat before her appointment. She smiles just as she's going to sleep. I had the camera ready this time. Want to get a photo when she does one of her big gummy smiles heh

And taken just a couple mins ago.... my non-napping baby in my lap.... sharting up a storm. Ew...


Monday, August 27, 2012

1st day of many

My first day alone with Zoe. It's been ok so far. Going to be VERY difficult to pump on a schedule though. I was already late pumping this morning b/c baby girl didn't want to go back to sleep lol.
She woke up at 9 and only just went to sleep at 11:40. I did manage to pump in there when she was having some quiet awake time, but it was interrupted a few times heh.

She slept SO well last night. I went to bed at about 9, DH soon followed with Zoe. She didn't wake up until 1am and I was already awake and had just got done pumping.
She went right back to sleep and woke again at 5am. She went back to sleep around 6am and then slept until 9. I hope it's like that every night.

Just wanted to clarify. When we're trying to keep her up, we're not doing anything extreme or anything and our efforts usually don't work anyway :P
Examples of what we do. Feed her exactly every 2 hours. When she's awake feeding (which usually takes a while b/c we have to wake her to get her to actually eat), we'll try to stimulate her a bit to wake her a bit more.... like rubbing her back, tickling her feet etc.
We'll take a little extra time to change her diaper... etc etc.
Like I said, nothing extreme to keep her awake and she usually just sleeps right through it all.
____

Wanted to really quick list some of the baby items we're finding to be useful or not so much.

Useful:

Wipes Warmer- The nursery is a bit cooler than the rest of the house so wet wipes plus a cool room would equal a chilly baby butt during diaper changes. Love this thing!

Waterproof pads- We use them on the changing pad and boy.. they've saved us quite a few times when Zoe has decided diaper changes are a good time to pee and poo.

Boppy pillow- I have SUCH weak arms and this pillow is a lifesaver when it comes to that. Puts baby in to comfy positions for her and whoever is holding her.

Sleep sack w/ elastic bottom- Imagine what Maggie Simpson wears. That's what I'm talking about. Seriously... these things are a MUST. Keeps baby warm and makes diaper changes easy. Plus most of them will have the little cuff thing at the end of the sleeves so you can flip them out to cover baby's hands. If you're expecting a LO or wondering what to get someone that is going to have a baby.... get these!!

SwaddleMe Blankets- Another must! Zoe is starting to out grow hers, but we're still using them while we can. Yes regular blankets are cheaper, but these things make swaddling a whole lot easier and safer. No need to worry about a blanket coming loose and causing a possible problem. Velcro on these things are nice and strong and baby is NOT getting out of them.

Avent Soothie Pacifier- It's what they gave us at the hospital and it's the only kind Zoe likes that we've tried. They're cheap and sold pretty much everywhere they sell baby stuff.

Burp clothes/ Wash clothes & Bibs- Didn't think we'd need bibs until later, but bottle feeding is messy messy.

Lanolin- I don't use it as much as I should, but the stuff def works. It's a lot thicker than I thought it was going to be and makes it a bit awkward getting the stuff out of the tube, but yeah.. it works when I use it heh. Pumping does not mean you're not going to have sore nips!

Hands free pumping bra- Made pumping SOOOOO much easier. I do wish they made them with straps though like a nursing bra but w/ the holes for the nipples/nip shields. That way I could actually sleep in it and not have to worry about completely stripping down and putting it on when I pump. It's going to suck when it gets cold outside having to undress to put it on, but oh well.

Clothes with wide or buttoned neck holes- Zoe has a big head and does NOT enjoy having clothes pulled over it. So any clothes with a nice wide neck hole or one that offers buttons to make it wider are greatly appreciated!



Not so useful items

The swing- We just don't use it that much. Zoe doesn't seem to like it that much and she doesn't sleep in it very well so we really haven't used it.

The crib- We do use it every once in a while, but it's usually to dress her in or put her down momentarily while we get something. We def could've waited to buy it, but oh well.

Footie outfits- Like footie pajamas. We put her in one and yep, it was ADORABLE, but it's a bit of a PITA changing her diaper. If you insist on getting these... buy them with the BUTTONS, NOT the zipper.
Whoever designed the ones w/ the zippers had NO idea WTH they were doing. the zippers zip UP towards the neck.... now just think about that for a moment when it comes to changing diapers.
Yeah... you'd have to take the entire outfit off just to change the diaper. So frickin stupid.


I'm sure there are more things I can think of but Zoe is waking up. I'll post more later if I think of anything else.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Thanks so much!

Just wanted to post really quick and HUGE HUGE

Thank you!

to everyone giving me breastfeeding/pumping advice. It is SO appreciated.
Honestly, I'm not sure if I want to breastfeed. I enjoyed the closeness but the nip pain and her frustration at not latching correctly & my limited options for positions to get her on the boob... I'm not sure if it's something I'm going to go back to. MAYBE, but maybe not....really haven't decided on it yet.

Pumping has been... not bad. I pump every 2-3hrs and my supply seems to be steady for now. Maybe get more or less here and there but it's not a huge difference.
I'm pumping enough to give her a bottle of breast milk when she's hungry so although it's not a huge supply w/ leftovers to freeze, it's sufficient to give to her most of her feedings.
Had a day or 2 where most of her feedings came from breastmilk. Makes me happy to be able to provide that for her... plus it saves us money if we don't have to use the formula lol.


Anywho.... just wanted to say all of that, but mostly just wanted to say Thanks to everyone :)

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

2 weeks

2 weeks old today. Geeze.
Feels like an eternity but also like it flew by at the same time. Hard to believe that Zoe was born just 2 weeks ago.

She is doing well. We're trying to get her to stay up during the day a bit more so she'll sleep at night better. We only started yesterday pretty much so we'll see how that goes lol.
She's such a cute little monkey though.... even when she's crying up a lung :P lol
Still doesn't like diaper changes but we're used to that now.
We're still using disposables on her until her cord falls off. It's pretty crusty and hard so hopefully that will happen soon. Save us some money since we're having to buy formula.

I'm ok. Fanny pack still aches but not as bad. It along with the rest of my stomach is SO jiggly. It's gross, but to be expected.
Finally down below 200lbs again so woo! heh I know the fanny pack and a little bit of the rest of my stomach is retaining some water, but my legs seem to be back to normal finally. Yay :D
Pumping is ok. Still not getting too much boob juice, but any little bit to give to her is ok by me. Sucks that we have to supplement with formula b/c it's damn expensive, but anything to keep her happy and fed :) We only just now had to buy formula. Everything we've been using before has been samples and free stuff which is frickin awesome. Wish we could've gotten more.
Thankfully it doesn't seem like anything I eat disagrees with her stomach so I haven't really had to watch what I've been eating.

Erm... think that's about it. Swear I'll start posting on the other side soon.... or soonish heh.
Sleep is still greatly desired but it's getting better. I'm gonna def be doing the "sleep when baby sleeps" thing when DH goes back to work. I sleep like crap at night and with him going back I'm going to have to start getting up with her to let him sleep so he can at least half way function at his job heh.
It's all good. We'll adjust.

Anywho! Zoe spam!

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Sleep at night!

Oh Zoe was doing so well sleeping at night. It's still not terrible, but she's seems to be waking more during the night and sleeping more during the day. That's just not gonna cut it! lol
We try waking her up but she just goes right back to sleep after we change her, feed her etc.

I dunno WTH I'm gonna do with having to pump, take care of her etc etc on my own. And during the night when DH starts back to work.... it's gonna be rough.
____

I forgot to mention in my last post that I'm sure my 24hr induction/labor didn't do anything to help w/ the pain either. Even though I had the epi doesn't mean my body wasn't doing a lot of work. So I'm sure that along w/ the actual c-sec increased the amount of pain I was in and still am in. It's not so bad now, still don't feel great, but thankfully not as bad.
Only had to take one ibuprofin and 2 tylenol today and that's mainly for a headache that does not want to go away.

My dang fanny pack still hurts though. Think it's b/c there's still a considerable amount of swelling/water in that pooch. Was thinking about putting on the belly band to try to I dunno.. squeeze it out or something lol *shrugs*
____

My milk supply still sucks. Sigh. Thinking about adding in protein powder to see if that will help (thanks for the tips btw SLESE). Fenugreek seemed to help a little. I'm pumping just over 1oz, but yeah, that's still not nearly what I should be getting.
I've been doing it every 2-3hrs and sigh... it's just frustrating when you're doing everything right and still nothin.
Thank goodness for formula though. I'm still gonna try to get my supply up naturally, but if still nothing by the time my 6w appointment, I may ask for a med to help.
I REALLY don't want to do that though so going to try everything else first.

And yep... fenugreek def makes you smell like maple syrup. It's frickin weird lol.
____

Gonna go lay down for a bit see if that helps get rid of this headache.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

My experience with this C-sec

Just wanted to have a post about my experience with this c-section so far.
I feel like a lot of women don't really go in to just how difficult it is recovering from one.
Yes c-sections are done all the time, and people can tell you that it's major surgery until they're blue in the face, but until you've actually had one, you just don't realize.
I know I didn't.

I'm not typing this to scare anyone away from getting a c-sec done, I just feel like a woman should be as prepared as possible for what's to come if one is done.
I know I really wasn't and I guess you really can't be until you've gone through it or something similiar.
Anyway, I know I'll probably scare some, and that really isn't my intention. I just think some honest details about what it's like is needed. Maybe it will help someone that will have one done so they're not so shocked by how difficult it is or hell, maybe they'll get lucky and it will be much easier. Anyway blahblah.. here goes.



Recovery is difficult and painful!!! It sucks plain and simple. I still hurt and it's almost 2 weeks later. I know that's not a huge amount of time that has passed but when you feel like you've been hit, run over, and run over again... 2 weeks is long enough.
Not sure if it's just me b/c the actual incision doesn't hurt, it's my damn nasty flabby fat fanny pack that is bothering me. They made the incision right under it at the "fold". Not sure why that particular spot hurts though... so annoying.
I have to put a pad in that area to keep the moisture away b/c lord knows how terrible it would be if it got infected. Thankfully everything looks good though so far.

I'm just now able to actually stand up straight most of the time or sit on the toilet without having to ease down sloooowly.

You do not realize just how much you use your ab muscles until they hurt. Seriously, every damn movement and action comes from that area.

C-section requires you to be pumped with a TON of IV fluids which makes you swell.... seriously... it's gross how much you do swell. My legs are just now starting to look normal, but they're still swollen along with the rest of my body. I'm still well above what I weighed when I first got pregnant. I know it's not ALL just from the IV fluids but I know a good chunk of it is.
If you've never had swollen legs before, it is a damn weird and gross feeling. Your legs feel tight and super heavy.

Even though I did have excellent care in the hospital, I think because they were so busy, I was forgotten about and should've been made to get up and move sooner to help the healing process begin.
When I finally was able to get up and move (after they took out my IV, catheter) holy hell that was TERRIBLE. Pain meds can only do so much.

Having someone help you out is a MUST. You seriously can't do anything or at least it feels like you can't.
I'm VERY lucky that my DH has been so helpful and hasn't complained at all with all that he's had to do these last 2 weeks. I never realized just how helpless and useless I'd be after this and honestly, I'm kinda freaking out at the thought of having to do this alone during the day when he's at work. I know I'll get the hang of taking care of her on my own, but it still scares me that I'll still be in too much pain to do much.

The first poo after giving birth can take a while and will probably hurt. It took me a week to poo and good lord was it difficult!! Stool softeners didn't do jack squat for me.
Remember when I said you don't realize how much you use your ab muscles? Well... you def use them to try to poop and trying to strain out even a pebble hurts.
Oh and it didn't all come out at once. Oh no...... first poop was just a tiny amount. I think I'm just now at the point where all of that constipation has worked its way out.
Oh and being that constipated... you fart.. A LOT. Thankfully my gas didn't stink, but being seated or laying a certain way, I wouldn't be able to push the gas out so it would build and build and build until it was painful and I HAD to move to get it out.


Alrighty.... I probably have more to add, but I'm tired and baby is sleeping so I'm off to hopefully catch at least an hour of sleep before I have to pump again.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

1 week old

Gosh, can't believe Zoe is 1 week old today. Frickin crazy how fast time flies by.

I know some women are natural moms, but that is not me. I have patience which all parents need... but I'm so clueless with everything else lol.

And I am still SOOOO tired. Guess it's just my body still healing, but it would be nice to wake up feeling refreshed.
I'm def going to be hurting when DH goes back to work and I have to do everything myself during the day. Sleep when I can inbetween taking care of her and pumping.

Pumping is the same. Get 1oz if I'm lucky every 2 hours. Wish this fenugreek stuff would hurry up and work if it's going to.

I'm feeling ok. Still sore and achy but I can actually stand up and sit down without too much problem. It's only been a week so I need to keep telling myself that it's going to take a bit longer to feel better. It's like time flew by and also is going at a snail's pace too.

Oh not sure if I mentioned this. But we're using disposables right now. B/c of her jaundice and our need to get her to poop as often as possible to help clear it up... she developed a mild diaper rash kind of thing b/c we had to wipe her so often. So we decided to use disposables while all of this is going on since it would be easier.

Zoe is doing well. Don't notice any kind of yellow tint to her eyes or skin any longer which I'm so happy about.
She's a little piggy too and is eating more. Not WAY more or anything lol, but just more.
She's still a fussy little chipmunk though and def does NOT enjoy getting her diaper changed at all. She screams bloody murder if we take too long which often happens b/c she likes to poop and pee as soon as the clean diaper is under her butt or right before so it gets all over the waterproof mat and gets on her :P

Anyway... here's some Zoe spammage :)


Me sitting her up. She is holding her own head up even though it looks like I'm doing it for her. My fingers are just there to keep her head from falling forward too quick :)

Me holding her

DH holding her



Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Update

Sorry I haven't been updating much. Even though things have calmed down a considerable amount, it still feels hectic.

Just wanted to give an update and post some details that I forgot to include.

Reason we started giving her a pacifier is b/c in the hospital she would comfort 'feed'. I say feed loosely though b/c she would just end up falling asleep and moving her mouth without actually suckling. It was killing my nipples and a nurse suggested we try a pacifier and yep, sure enough, Zoe took right to it.
I didn't like the idea of giving it to her b/c I saw how difficult it was for my SiL to ween her oldest off of one, but I'd much rather Zoe use it than having to try to get her to stop sucking her thumb. Can't exactly take her thumbs away from her :P


DH and I have been pooed on more than we care to remember now and baby girl isn't even a week old yet lol.
She waits until she's getting changed to let it flow. Ew.... heh
We've gone through many many many clean diapers b/c of it. Sneaky monkey!

Tried breastfeeding again yesterday but she wasn't having it. :( She did the whole comfort thing, but when the hunger hit... she did not want to work for it.
Kinda makes me sad, but I'm ok with pumping and giving her breastmilk in a bottle. Whatever it's gonna take to keep her nice and fed :)

Had another appointment today to check on her jaundice and her level has gone down even more which is awesome. Doc said that it should be cleared up by the end of the week.
AND she's already back to her birth weight :)
She was not a happy camper this morning though. Cried her little lungs out while we waited for the doc to see her.

I'm still pretty achy and tight feeling. But it's getting better. It better be b/c I don't have many percocets left. Ibuprofin should be enough by the time I am out of them though.
I'm also SO frickin swollen it's gross.
I have elephant legs right now and absolutely no ankles. My legs are so heavy and just gross.
My stomach is also pretty swollen still. I weigh more now than I did when I had Zoe. How screwed up is that?
Wish it would hurry up and resolve itself.
Oh I forgot to mention that my dog Cid... the almost 30lb little spoiled frenchie/boston decided it would be a good idea to jump on to my c-sec scar when my brother and his family came over one day.
I was reclined on the sofa and he frickin jumped right on to it. That hurt like hell and I started crying instantly from the pain. It still hurts more where he landed but everything looks ok. Just think it got bruised.
Damn dog, but not mad at him. Not like he knew :P

Breastmilk production has been... meh, just ok.
I pump about every 2 hours and am only just now managing an ounce for both boobs. Not much at all considering Zoe will eat 2oz easily each feeding.
Started taking fenugreek a couple days ago and hoping that will kick in soon.
Also bought some oatmeal yesterday and ate first bowl today (bleh). So yeah, doing what I can to get my milk production up. I want to get to at least 1oz each boob.

And speaking of my boobs... they're HUGE. I was a small c cup before... regular c on a good day. They're about a full overflowing D to a small DD now.
And I absolutely LOOOOOOVE these nursing bras. Thought they were going to feel weird wearing them but they're super super comfortable.

Zoe sleeps so well at night right now. She'll get up when hungry, but will usually go right back to sleep no prob after eating. And she sleeps even better in the morning giving DH and I much much needed rest (especially DH).
Hopefully this continues as she gets older. I can wish! heh

Uhm, I'm sure I'm leaving out some stuff, so if I think of it will post it up when I can.
And will try to post more photos tomorrow and actually update my TTC blog like I wanted to do lol.

Sunday, August 12, 2012

The birth of Zoe... or at least what I remember of it

Woke up at around 4am on Tuesday morning and got ready to go to the hospital.
We arrived there at a little after 5:30am and were taken right back to a room where I undressed and got in to my ripped hospital gown. Yep... it was ripped... awesome.

Sat in there for about 20mins and waited for the nurse to come back. She asked a bunch of stuff, put in my IV and started me on a bag of IV fluids.
The pitocin was started about an hour? later. Honestly, I was not keeping track of anything so my times are probably WAY off lol.
Was feeling decent, and then started to have aching in my lower back. Very similiar to what I've experienced my last few periods w/ crampiness.
Everyone made sure to tell me that if I wanted an epidural, ask for it and I could get it whenever I wanted.
Once the back aches started and knowing it could be a while before I would actually get the epi, I went ahead and asked for it maybe hmm.. 30min-1hr after the pit was started.
Epidural was a strange sensation. The only thing that hurt was the numbing shots before the epi was placed. When the epi was placed and they pumped in the meds... that was frickin weird. It felt exactly like they said... cool/cold water being poured down my back.
I could still move my legs pretty well, it's just that they had that 'gone to sleep' feeling. From my calf down, they were extremely tingly... from my waist to the knee... it was tingly and numb.

Everything was going so slow. My cervix was very very very slowly dilating and effacing. I was reassured that things were still looking good even if it was slow. The doctor came in when I was finally at 4 or 5cm and broke my water. Just felt like heavy flow period gushes to me.

Fast forward to around I have no idea lol. Maybe late night Tuesday, maybe early early AM Wed. I had started to feel that crampiness in my back again along with pressure in my butt whenever I had a contraction. They were looking for that feeling, but when it's continuous and not just w/ a contraction.
Fast forward a bit more and was told that the pit was being turned off because baby wasn't handling it well. Not dangerous, but just not well.
So was off the pit for a bit and my contractions spaced out a lot. Baby's heartrate came back up so pit was started again but on a much lower dose to see how baby would react.
Again not well and I was not progressing at all without the pitocin.
I was 8cm dilated and 90% effaced and stuck there.
So it was suggested that a c-section was needed and by the 24hr mark, I agreed. I didn't want it, but knew it was for the best to make sure Zoe was ok.
They explained what was going to happen, had me sign some stuff and then wheeled me off to the OR.

They switched my epi med to whatever the hell they use and I was pretty much numb from my chest down. I had an instant reaction to the stuff though. I immediatly got nauseous, told them and just about threw up all over the place, but a nurse got there just in time for me to throw up in a bag.
The meds they gave me also gave me really bad shakes. I wasn't cold, but was shaking like I was. Very weird.
Anyway, DH came in and they started. I kept my eyes closed for most of it. Not b/c I was scared but mostly b/c I was exhausted from almost no sleep and having the whole experience turn towards something I was hoping wouldn't happen.

I felt absolutely nothing though. I know I've read some women feel pressure. I didn't even feel that. I felt some tugging when they were pulling her out, but that was it.
I started crying when I knew they were getting her out though and of course cried some more when they showed her to me briefly over the curtain.
DH was crying too and hearing her cry was.... amazing.
It was such a sense of relief that she was finally with us.
After they did they checked her out they gave her to DH and he tried showing her to me. I couldn't really move but man... what I did see was amazing heh.
She was born at 7:35? am, weighed in at 7lbs 5oz, and was 19.something inches long. No idea what her apgar scores were. 8-9 for the first one I think and I'm sure the same or better for the 2nd.

DH goes off to the nursery with her while the docs fix me all up. That took a while but whatever. They put me over in to a diff bed, pulled out my epi and wheeled me off to the recovery area.

Now this is where it REALLY sucked. The epi started to wear off and they took FOREVER to give me any pain meds. They had a reason, but I can't remember why exactly. I just knew I started to ache and it was getting damn painful.
Then, the nurse had to do the abdominal massages to make sure that my uterus was contracting and doing what it should.
Holy mother of god.... that was the most painful damn thing ever. I don't know how to explain what it felt like.... Hell on Earth? Yeah, that sounds about right.

I eventually get some pain meds, they eventually kick in after being tortured some more lol, and DH comes in and shows me photos he took of Zoe in the nursery.
They finally have our room ready, DH goes and gets our things from the labor room and I'm moved in to the couplet care room.

I can't really remember the sequence of what happened after that. DH comes in with the stuff, they bring in Zoe for me to meet finally and she was adorable, beautiful and perfect.

Everything after is a bit of a blur.
When they tell you to rest.... laugh in their faces because it is IMPOSSIBLE to rest in the damn hospital.
Maybe with vaginal birth it's not that bad, but c-sec? They bother you every damn hour, or if it's not a nurse coming in to take vitals or check on you, it's a machine beeping and going off that you have to call in.
Our time in the hospital was... exhausting. The care I recieved was beyond fantastic, don't get me wrong... but DH & myself got almost no sleep the entire time.
That is a feeling I never want to have again. Just pure and utter exhaustion.

What am I leaving out.... oh... I did breastfeed in the hospital. BFing is VERY difficult. I wish Zoe was one that knew how to do it well, but yeah, her inexperience along with my own... it's been very hard.
Plus, my mom, MiL, and DH's aunt, oh and my mom's husband have all now seen my boobs along with every nurse and tech that came in lol. I just did not care which is so unlike me.
I care NOW though, but in the hospital, I didn't give a crap who saw my boobs.

Thursday, they told us tha Zoe was borderline jaundice. We could stay until Saturday or, go home Friday and then take her in to the ped's office to get checked out.
We wanted to go home, so we were discharged on Friday and left that afternoon.

Finally being home was surreal to say the least. That feeling along with the extreme exhaustion left DH and I both feeling like we were dreaming.
I know I keep mentioning it, but I just can not put in to words how worn out and tired we were.
I'm surprised DH could even function b/c I could do absolutely nothing while in the hospital except for laying in the bed and holding Zoe every once in a while. He did everything for us and got even less sleep than I did.

Seriously, DH has been... beyond amazing. He's done anything and everything for Zoe and myself. It makes me feel bad that I can't really help out as much, but I know that's not my fault. Still makes me feel terrible though that he has to do so much. It is giving him a lot of time with Zoe though and he's totally wrapped around her little fingers.

Zoe hasn't exactly been the perfect calm little baby lol, but we're just so totally smitten by her that we don't care.
She's our little miracle and it's crazy that she's all ours heh.

That's all for now.... I know I left out a bunch of stuff, but I'm still pretty damn exhausted so it's really difficult for me to think straight. It's not exactly a feeling I enjoy having, but when I think about why I feel this way, it's not so bad anymore.

I'll try to add in details here and there that I've forgotten later.

Oh and Zoe had a follow-up appointment today and her jaundice is already getting a lot better :)


And finally..... Congrats Jen on your little girl!!! Can't believe we had our girls on the same day!

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Zoe spam

No birth story yet. It's coming though, just been tired, busy, trying to figure things out basically heh.

Quick update though. Zoe's jaundice got a little worse so we have to use this ultraviolet light thing on her all day or as much as we possibly can. It's not that bad, just awkward at times.
Her jaundice has been causing her to sleep a lot more though. Poor baby :(
She seems to be getting better already though. We've been instructed to increase her feedings quite a bit to get her to poop more and that along with the UV thing... it seems to be working already.

Anyway, more Zoe spam for now :)
What she wore to her first ped appointment. She looks so big b/c of the cloth diaper heh. It's HUGE and bulky looking on her.

What she wore on the way home from the appointment. We had to undress her and put on a clean diaper and she started to poop as soon as DH opened up the diaper. Poo juice got sprayed a bit everywhere. Ew.

A couple of photos taken at different times to show that she knows how to hold in her pacifier. It surprised the heck out of DH and I when she did it the first time and even more after the 2nd. Clever little monkey butt :)
Also never thought we'd be using a pacifier but we'd rather her suck on that rather than suck on her hands. I'll explain in birth experience why pacifier was started.

After her first bath at home tonight :)

Nice and warm in her sleep sack

Camo girl w/ the UV thing on underneath.

Friday, August 10, 2012

And heeeeeere's Zoe!

This post is gonna be quick since I need sleep.

Zoe was born on August 8th 2012 via a c-section.
Was induced on Tuesday, but due to stalling and Zoe not tolerating the pitocen very well, it was decided that I should have the c-section.
A little bummed it turned out that way, but honestly it didn't matter that much to me so long as she got here safe.
She was born at 7:35?am (will have to check that) weighing in at 7lbs 5oz and coming in at 19.something inches long. She was just over 19, not sure on exact measurements. Have it written somewhere heh.
Her estimated weight was right on the money though :)

The staff at the hospital were frickin fantastic, BUT with the c-sec, having to be hooked up to so much stuff and having to be checked ALL the time... I haven't slept more than a handful of hours since Tuesday.
To say I'm exhausted is understatement of the decade.

Zoe is doing pretty well. She is so adorable, but she is super super fussy. It does get exhausting, but we're just so in love with her that it doesn't matter.
She's borderline jaundice so we have to take her in early tomorrow to get checked out.
She also doesn't really breastfeed very well. It's lack of experience on both our parts though heh. Doesn't help that I have weird boobs and a gut so it's difficult to get her in to position. We're getting there though.
And b/c of the jaundice, we decided to suppliment a little bit of formula to help with it. I started to pump today to help keep my supply and hopefully get my milk to come in. It's already starting to come in a little bit, but not quite there yet. Also.. giving her formula is helping to keep my nipples attached to me lol.
BFing hasn't been easy but I'm really hoping that it will improve.

My recovery has been ok. Lots of pain, but thankfully there are pain meds for it heh. I'm still not very functional though and I can't do too much.
Thankfully DH has been absolutely amazing and is doing everything short of breastfeeding lol.
He's just been the best to little Zoe and myself.

Anyway... there's a lot more I'll post about when I get some more rest and have time to post again.
For now.. here's some quick Zoe spam.

DH holding Zoe after she was born. You can't tell but he (along with myself) burst in to tears when she was born.

DH proud of his swaddling skills lol. He really is very good at it and did it better than the nurses IMO.

A photographer came to take some photos of Zoe. DH took these while waiting for her. It was a really quick session and we're of course not required to buy any of them. I think we may though b/c they turned out super cute!

And at home this afternoon. Just got done breastfeeding her. She was awake and taking a look around so took advantage of that and snapped some photos :)


Of course have a ton more photos to share too. Will try to post more tomorrow or the next day. We'll see :)

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

39 weeks... today is the day!

Have a little bit of time this morning to post so here I am.
It's 4:43am right now. Woke up... well.. actually was waking up all night long. Figured it would happen so meh. Still sucks that I couldn't get in some good sleep heh.

To answer a question that was asked.

I'm being induced because of my gestational diabetes. The practice that I go to doesn't like for women with GD to go over their due date. I think my OB said that with GD, the placenta degrades quicker or something. Honestly a lot of info goes in one ear and out the other. Not one purpose, it's just the way my brain DOESN'T work when in a doc office lol.
Since this little lady isn't estimated to be huge, I was given the option of being induced closer to my due date or at 39w, and welp, here I am :D
With my weekly ultrasounds they made sure that she passed whatever they were looking for every time. And then that along with the weekly NSTs... lots of monitoring to make sure this little lady was ok :)

And nope, didn't see the story on the star wars room heh. That's awesome though!

Feeling a whole range of emotion here. Nerves have finally hit, well, maybe not nerves, just...  nervous excited. I'm really not nervous about labor, it's being a parent that makes me nervous lol.
DH & I have never really been around a baby much and it makes us both nervous that now... we're gonna be responsible for one! EEP! lol
I'm sure it's the same for any new parent though and we're gonna adjust quickly... hopefully :P

Alrighty, think that's about it before we head out. I'm sure we'll be leaving in about 10-20mins O_O
Gotta eat and drink as much as I can now before I'm not allowed to.

Will be back in a couple of days! Hopefully to share a great, positive birth story and show off some Zoe spammage :)

Monday, August 6, 2012

Last appointment

Sorry for not posting earlier! Just completely forgot to b/c I was tired & hungry lol.

So this morning's appointment went well. Had my u/s and Zoe was being a stubborn sleepy baby. She's still looking good though and is still only estimated to be just over 7lbs. So PHEW! Thought she was going to be estimated to over 8. I know there's still a chance that she could be 9lbs or so though.

The u/s tech reassured me that her head was also not too big lol. My vagina silently thanked her :P

Saw the doc after that and learned that my cervix has done absolutely nothing. Still about 1cm and 50-75% effaced. Really?? Geeeeeeeeze
I was TOTALLY wrong about her coming early. Hell, by the way my body ISN'T reacting... I probably would've gone well past the due date.

Anyway... the OB said that I was in a grey area. If I wanted, I could come in tonight to try out the cervidil, BUT it may not do anything. Or I could just wait until tomorrow to come in.
So I picked tomorrow. One more restful day at home sounds better than the hospital. Although we are going to have to wake up at like 4:30 to get ready. Bleh.

I also asked about how long it usually takes for induced babies to arrive. And on average she said about 12-18hours. Hopefully Zoe will make her appearance sooner or at least within that timeframe.

Also asked about the epidural and pushing. She said by the time it's time to push, I shouldn't be in pain but should still feel a lot of pressure like I have to poo really bad and hopefully will be able to tell if I'm pushing correctly.

Also learned that I can ask for the epidural whenever I want. I don't have to be a certain cm dilated before I can get it, although I will have to have the 2 IV bags of fluid in me before I can get it, but that shouldn't be a problem.

Uhm, oh I also asked about c-section and when they would decide if one should be done.
She told me that usually if I've been induced, and there is no progress in about 12hrs, then they'll give me the option of going home and coming back another time, or just getting the c-sec done (if baby is still ok and they haven't broken my water).
Also, if I've stalled. Like say I'm stuck at 6cm dilated for a very long extended amount of time... they'll want to do one then.
And of course if baby or myself aren't doing well.
So that's good to know.


I think that's it. Gosh... so weird, exciting, scary to think that tomorrow, we're gonna be parents! I so can not wait to meet this little lady.
And even though I am ready to not be pregnant, it's going to be weird going back to normal.

I'll update again, maybe tomorrow morning if things aren't too hectic. If not, then I'll update when we're home. Both on this blog and the TTC one :)

Sunday, August 5, 2012

2 days! O_O

DH set up the baby monitor yesterday. Not sure how it works exactly and it sounds a bit PITA b/c you can't have too much movement in the room or it will set off the motion detection on it. We'll see how it works soon enough though.

DH is so cute. I know I gush over him, but just can't help it.
He's so nervous about being a new dad and just being around a new baby!
Im sure every new parent, specially those that didn't grow up around babies are nervous about that aspect as well. I know I am.
It's like, you know babies aren't super fragile or anything, but you can't help but treat them that way, I guess until you're used to being around them, handling them etc.
We'll get used to it quick enough, but it's still so cute that he's nervous about that hehe.
____

Man... I just can't wait until Tuesday. Or well, tomorrow to see if I have to go in Monday night.
I'm really not nervous about the induction or labor in general, think I just have worries about the "What ifs" though as Im sure every woman does.
What if something goes wrong? What if baby get distressed? What if what if what if.
That can't be helped I guess.
I'm sure I'll be hooked up to all sorts of monitors and whatnot and will be in the best place possible if, gawd forbid, anything does go wrong.

Just so excited. Soon we'll be meeting our little daughter!!!!

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Adventure in pubeville

Started off with minimum hopes and even those were dashed tonight.
Bought Nads wax strips along with Sally Hansen.
Tried Nads first (seriously, who named this crap?) and HUGE failure.
Ripped out maybe 5 hairs total and left a ton of sticky crap residue on my skin. I tried in a few different areas before just giving up. My ass cheeks were literally glued together. HAHAHAHA! Not sure how it got all the way back there but that was def a new sensation. (isn't that an INXS song? hmmm.. don't think they were talking about that.... or were they? o_o)
Thankfully have some Ben Nye makeup & adhesive remover leftover from Halloween. Stuff works awesome and seperated my butt cheeks once more.

So yep.... big thumbs down for that stuff when it comes to bikini line. May try it again down the road... on my pits or legs, but I'll just have to settle for the electric hair trimmer and a razor for the forest down below.
____

Zoe once gain was SUPER active today. Started around 5:30 and she didn't stop until after 7.
I wonder if she's gonna be that active when she's out in to the world? I'm sure we'd be thrilled at first and then later on just wish she would sleep already hehe.

Nothin much

Went to Target. Thankfully wasn't as busy as I was fearing. Probably b/c it was still kinda early. Bought some wax strips ehehehe.... that's gonna be awkward and painful!
Going to go in to my induction with one strip of hair gone and the rest still hairy rofl.

Bought some Arby's for lunch and boiled peanuts on the way home. Yum yum!!! If you've never had boiled peanuts... they're DELICIOUS!
Don't buy the canned crap they sell in stores.... you can make your own very easily if you have the time.
Salt, water, & raw peanuts in the shell. You could add in other spices if you want but it's really not necessary IMO. Boil until they're the hardness you want. I like mine kind of more on the soft/mushy side so that's hours. You can find good instructions on the net for how to do it *nodnod*

We were debating on going to the movie. I was flip flopping on it and then just said screw it.. lets go.
I really had no interest in seeing the Total Recall remake, but it wasn't a bad movie. Still like the original one better, but this new one isn't bad.


Anywho... back home and trying to figure out what I want to eat for dinner heh.
We had buffalo wings last night... or well, I did and DH had a chicken sandwich thing..... wings still sound good though. BUT so does Chinese... steak sounds good too, but think I may want to wait until Monday night for that one.
I'll see what DH wants but I know he's just going to leave it up to me as usual... sigh.

3 days!!

*happy dance* So glad it's the weekend :)
Last night's family dinner wasn't so bad. Of course MiL and DH's aunt were excited and asked if we were. Thought they'd be annoying but thankfully they didn't go too crazy lol.

We went to Walmart afterwards. BIG mistake. Frickin forgot that it's tax-free weekend! They were busy as hell AND we still forgot what we went there for to begin with. DUH.
Think we're going to brave it or Target this morning. I want to get a wallet or something smallish so I won't have to carry around my purse along w/ a diaper bag. Only reason I carry a purse is for my debit, driver's license etc stuff anyway. Everything else.. meh.
____

Actually slept pretty well last night. Probably helps that I didn't actually go to bed until midnight.
I just didn't feel tired at all and wanted to watch the Olympics.
Frickin NBC though. Was waiting up all night to watch the trampoline event... and what do they do? Leave it for the last possible second and THEN only show 3 athletes doing it. WTF???
Did get to see that 15yo swimmer totally kick everyone's ass though. That was cool heh.

Anyway... boooo NBC.

When I did finally go to bed... I guess I was more tired than I realized b/c I got to sleep pretty quick and only got up twice to pee during the night. Probably helps that I was kinda dehydrated and wasn't drinking anything like I usually do after using the bathroom though.
____

Zoe was going crazy while I was watching tv. She loooooooves laying towards my left side. Her booty pointed towards the left so she can stretch her little legs out to the right.
She was kicking and moving all over the place. It was so cool feeling whatever knobby part she was moving around heh. There was one point when it felt like she stretched her legs towards my ribs and then really quickly pulled it back in.
Not sure if she was startled by something or what. Silly little monkey.
____

And finally for now.... once baby girl is born... I'm going to start posting again on my TTC blog. I posted a link to it over on the right *points*

Guess I could've just made a new blog for baby shit, but meh... just use what I already have up.
Plus I'll be posting about losing weight again, on the road to start TTC again, etc etc so I think my other blog will be appropiate for that :)

Friday, August 3, 2012

Offtopic & photos

Thought of this a few days ago...

Stores really need to offer other types of registries. Birthday, anniversary, Christmas, etc.

Obviously with Christmas and birthday ones.. it would kinda ruin any sort of surprise, but come on... how many times have we all gotten crap we don't want? How much easier would it have been if you could've just pointed someone to a Birthday or Christmas registry with all of the stuff you'd like on it? Plus it would help people shop for those folks that are difficult to buy for.

I think it's a very good idea *nodnod*
____

And photos :)
Stuff that MiL gave to us. Think some of the clothes might be hand-me-downs from SiL.

Cute blankets that MiL made. The prints are so cute and cheery

More wash clothes, mittens and socks

Couple of footie pjs that will be nice when it starts getting cooler. Not sure if these are from SiL

Hilarious onesie. It's so appropiate too. I swear.. FiL can and will sleep ANYWHERE. He's actually fallen asleep in a restaraunt before. The guy can sleep through anything and everything.

Super soft and warm outfit for when it gets cold

Newborn shirt. I think this one is from SiL, b/c I'm pretty sure I remember my neice wearing it..... honestly.. I hate it and think it's hideous and will conveniently forget that we have it so I don't have to put baby in it :P lol
Man I'm so bitchy! lol

She also bought a breathable bumper that I forgot to get a photo of. Meh, oh well.


And for the hell of it... a bump shot. 38w3d
Thought maybe my bump looked lower. Doesn't really in the photo.. def getting that kind of torpedo look to it heh. She must've been sticking her booty out
Not pictured are the new stretch marks I'm getting BLEH!
Have a few more small ones showing up on the other side of my belly button. Thankfully don't have that much more to go so FX they'll disappear after!

And is it weird that I like poking my belly button? It's still an innie, but there are certain positions I sit in that will make the upper part of it kind of poke out and it's all squishy lol. I can only imagine how amused I would be if I had an outie or if it flattened hehe.

4 days to go!

Counting today that is.
Broke down and cried this morning.
They were happy tears though. Just finally having our family... the thought overwhelmed me and I bawled in to my pillow.
Not that we weren't a family before or anything.

Kinda torn if I want this weekend to fly by or if I want it to go slowly. I want to spend these last couple of days with DH, but then again... I want our baby girl in our arms already. We'll see what happens I guess heh.
____

She has been a lot more active these last couple of weeks. Always read that their movements become less? or something like that, but that is not the case with her. Seems like when she's awake, she's awake for longer now and moves around like crazy in there. Gotta cherish it while I can.
Even after all of this time, I'm still fascinated by the movements and watching my bump go crazy from it heh.
____

Actually slept pretty well last night. I did end up taking about an hour nap yesterday afternoon. Kept waking myself up from snoring though heh.
Didn't go to bed until 11:30. Stayed up and watched some of the Olympics. Then I tossed and turned and got up to use the bathroom 3 times in 30mins, but eventually fell in to a good sleep.
Would've slept in a bit more this morning but our dogs internal clocks are so used to the routine we have that they start waking up and making noise etc.
____

MiL called at frickin 9:40 last night. Keep in mind that we go to bed at 10.
She thought I had seen the doctor yesterday and wanted to know how the appointment went. Uhm... why she couldn't call sooner is beyond me.
This is why I REALLY don't want anyone else in the room as I deliver. She was a frickin annoying nervous wreck after SiL gave birth and would not shut up.
It's going to be bad enough having her visit while I'm in labor. I love her, but.... go away b/c you're stressing me out!
____

Ok... ungrateful time... well not really ungrateful, but I feel like I am complaining.
I HATE the diaper bag SiL gave me.
It's just one of those simple tote kinds w/ a large pocket in front and back. I HATE HATE HATE IT.
I really wish she hadn't bought it for me b/c it's just not me at all. When she first gave it, I was ok with it, but then after having it for a while... just no.
For one thing... there are only 2 short straps on it meaning I can't carry it around any other way except for my hand. I NEED something I can sling over my shoulder/neck.
And then... it's just a PoS construction.
I washed it b/c it stunk of cig smoke and something in between the inner layer and outter layer came loose and is in pieces in there. NM that the stitching on it is coming loose and creating holes already.

I do appreciate her thinking of me and getting it, but like I said... I really wish she hadn't or at least asked me what I wanted first.

Will probably go out and get myself a different one. I told DH last night that I was just going to use his, and his words
"Nuh uh! That's MY diaper bag!" HAHAHAHAHA so cute!
Anywho... If we had the money to spend on one, I wouldn't mind a Petunia Pickle Bottom bag. I'm really not one to go crazy over bags at all... but these are SO nice. They have the long strap that I like... they also have backpack straps too! Tons of pockets and just look nice.
Buy Buy Baby had some last time we went and.. sigh...
They're so frickin expensive though.. so I'll just keep on dreaming :P heh

These are the 2 fabric designs that I like though
http://www.buybuybaby.com/product.asp?SKU=40297781&
http://www.buybuybaby.com/product.asp?SKU=40177571&

Sigh.... I wants.....

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Final NST

It went well this morning. Zoe was cooperating FINALLY and was moving around all over the place. Probably helped that I had some yummy sugary trail mix for part of my breakfast lol.
I don't eat enough for it to be a problem, but I did still have a good bit.
Her reactions or whatever were looking good though :)
WOO!

OH and last night or this morning, can't remember... I felt her SUPER low. I swear I probably could've touched her (think it was her hand) if I wanted to up my vajangle. That's how low I felt her. She was right there.
Hopefully she doesn't try to come out with her hand/arm by her head though.
____

Photos time!
Scanned in some photos to share. Yes, it's me and my brother as kids. Just to show that damnit... we WERE once adorable hehe.

Baby me... think this photo was taken for my passport. I think Zoe is gonna have that much hair too. Not much but not totally bald :P

My brother. His first birthday.

My first birthday :D Not sure what it's called when they do this... and not sure if it's just for girls? *shrugs* I want to do it for Zoe though.... mostly b/c I just want to dress her up in something like that hehe.
And that's my brother being the giant goof he is.

And more of myself and my bro :)


Goofy faces and my pants hiked up to my armpits. WOO!

Wish I had more photos of him when he was little, but I guess those were in the sticky pages albums. Sigh....
Good times good times.
And when I say we were adorable.. come on.. how can you argue? lol
Not saying we are NOW.... puberty is a cruel cruel bitch. *nodnod*

Now... just need to get some baby photos of DH. Not sure who the hell has any. He needs to bug his family about it though.
We still have 3 white square picture frames. Was going to do cute little drawings in them, but I like the idea of having a photo of myself and DH as babies, and then have the middle be of Zoe when she arrives :)
Start our family picture wall.
____

Still need to get photos of the stuff MiL bought for us. It's in the dryer right now and meh, I don't feel like getting it out. I will later.