Monday, September 19, 2016

I think my newborn is broken...

That's the only explanation I can think of as to why he fights sleep so damn much and so often. Newborns are supposed to sleep and eat and poop/pee.
Not scream and cry and act like sleep is their mortal enemy.

Woke up at 3 to pump and feed Ez. I knew it was gonna be a long night b/c he completely woke up to eat instead of dream eating like he normally does.
I did get lots of cute little smiles and he acted like he was going to go back to sleep. HA! Just a ruse....
I was up until 5am trying to get his little butt back to sleep. And I swear he has a radar.
I'd stand by the bassinet and just wait to see if he was going to spit out his pacifier. As soon as I laid back down in bed... he'd start fussing.
This didn't happen just once... oh no... it happened at least half a dozen times.
I actually started tearing up near the end b/c I was just so frustrated and tired.
I could let DH get up some of the times too, but I'd be awake anyway b/c my brain just can not sleep when it hears any of my babies make a noise. Could be in deep sleep, but as soon as one of them burped.. I'd be awake. Maybe not wide awake, but still awake. Plus he has to go to work to make the money so... getting up with the baby is the least I can do.
He did get up once but Ez carried on for another 30min after until he finally went to sleep.

Zoe and Oren have thankfully been better the last couple of days.No screaming/crying fits for no reason.
There have been a few for a reason, but none for seemingly no reason lol.

I did have to watch 2 of my brother's kids yesterday for a few hours, but they were ok for the most part and Oren was kept occupied playing with the boy cousin.

Speaking of my brother.... him and his wife are giant thieving assholes. Well.. probably mostly my brother but his wife is in some serious denial if she doesn't question where their money is coming from.
Basically my brother is committing identity theft b/c they refuse to live within their means.
Plus he's a giant dumbass that keeps getting himself fired from perfectly great jobs for whatever reason.
All those comic con trips and trips to other cons (That SiL and one of their kids came back from... why I had to watch the other 2)... they can't afford that shit on his job.
But nope... they refuse to just accept the fact that they're poor and don't need to be spending money on stupid shit so... what do they do? Steal my mom's information and open up credit cards in her name.

Yes... seriously. My mom found out bc the banks kept calling her about paying the bills. My mom has NEVER owned a credit card. She didn't know WTH was going on until they straight up told her that it was my brother that opened up the account and that she can either pay the bill or she can press charges against my brother and he'll go to jail.
I was caught up in all this shit b/c my brother and his wife don't answer their phones when my mom calls them, so she calls me to call them.
She wanted to talk to my brother or else she was going to press charges which wouldn't do him or his family any good.
I talked to SiL and told her straight up what wwas going on. She did genuinely sound like she had no idea what he did. I told her to tell him... Would he rather get yelled and cursed at or would he rather go to jail?
He did end up talking to our mom, but my mom recently found out that he had gotten a credit card from another bank in her name.
Good lord he is a DUMBASS ASSHOLE.
I mean.. WTH did he think was going to happen when my mom was getting the bill and calls for credit cards she never opened? She can see the invoices and see that the purchases are being made locally. She may not speak English all that well, but she's not an idiot.
She doesn't have a ton of money.. she wasn't going to just sit back and pay off this crap.

Just UGH... piss me off.
Glad that they don't really talk to us b/c.... just ugh.
I love my brother and his wife, but gawd damn. Stop being scumbags and live within your means!
Be role models for your kids and not models of what not to be.

Enough of that...

Pumping is going well. About the same.
Don't think my boobs can physically hold anymore than what I've been getting (about 600-700ml per day)
I admit that I get a bit jealous when I look up info and see these women pumping 5+ oz each boob PER pump. Wow... that's insane to me.
And that's AFTER they already Bf'd their baby. What?? How???
I'm happy to get what I can get though. I know there are probably a lot of women they can't even get what I do.
Going to try to go for as long as I can.
It's helping that I'm logging all of the times and amounts that I'm getting. Helps to keep me on track and it's encouraging to see the numbers stay steady or increase a little. It is a bit sucky to see shit numbers too though so kind of a double edged sword, but it's mostly positive.

I haven't needed to take ibuprofin or tylenol for a few days now. The last time I did was for an awful headache that wouldn't go away. No pain in incision area though. I have had some pain and stiffness in my right hip which sucks.

Weight is staying steady at around 216 give or take. Hoping that with consistent pumping, that I"ll be one of those magical unicorn moms that drops the weight easily... lol.. yeah right.

Not really sure the lactation cookies are working. They're good, but not sure if the possibly benefit is worth all the sugar in them.

Have 2 appointments this week. One for a teeth cleaning and my 6w PP one. Fun :\

Birthday is tomorrow...... more sleep would be a great present but yeah.. that's not gonna happen lol.
DH better get me a birthday cake though. I don't care about getting a present... I just want a Publix birthday cake with giant frosting sugary diabeeteez flowers on it!! I've compromised too many times for my birthday dinner and cake. Getting disappointing shit that I didn't want b/c I didn't want DH to have to eat or get things he didn't like.
Well SCREW THAT NOISE this time. I want what I want and damnit.. I better get it!

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