YAY :)

Tonight was fun.
SiL was a bit of a buzzkill, but oh well... sucks for her.

Some photos first...
Zoe w/ DH.

Looking adorable!

With her cousins

And earlier in the day waking up from a nap. She just looked too cute w/ her hair messy :D
And gosh, I love that dimple!

We mostly strolled around with Zoe and walked my nieces around our neighborhood. A lot more kids this year, but unfortunatly not that many homes were giving out candy. Lots of walking to get to a house that was giving out any. But thankfully b/c of that, the people are usually pretty generous and give more than just one so my nieces got a lot of stuff.
Def not like the good ole days when you would haul in like a trash bag full of candy lol.
Oh well.

My brother and SiL stayed at our place and handed out candy. I bagged all the candy since it just seemed easier than giving out a few at a time and they ran out just as I was walking back w/ my oldest niece.
DH and my other niece along w/ Zoe had gone back to the house ahead of us b/c my youngest niece was done for the night.

Ok so.. my nieces are what... 9 and 7? And they are in TERRIBLE shape. Seriously, DH and I could've walked the entire neighborhood. DH is in good shape, but I am not, but we weren't walking fast or anything so we were both ok to walk it all. Anyway, we weren't even half way done when both girls started complaining about their legs being sore. And then the 7yo didn't even want to continue trick or treating and just wanted to go back. WTF???
9 and 7!!!!!! That just aint right. Man, I remember when I was that young. I had energy and then some and could go around my entire neighborhood and still have oodles of energy to do more stuff. Now I know you can't do that shit nowadays b/c people suck, but still....
That is just sad when a 9 and 7 yo are in that terrible of shape. And it's not like they're super overweight or something. They're slightly pudgy, the 7yo a bit more than the 9, but not enough that you would look at them and say they have a problem or that they're unhealthy in any way, ya know.
I dunno.. I just felt bad for them. Kids that age should be super active and able to outlast us lazy adults no problem.

Ok so..... back to SiL and my brother.... they've only purchased 7 diapers.... that's it!! WTF?? I guess maybe they're going to wait and see if they like cloth diapering? That's the only thing I can think of. It just ticked me off a little when I asked them if they needed inserts and she looks at me and says they don't have any (other than what came w/ the diapers they bought). UGH. So I had to give them some of Zoe's. She still has plenty. Thank goodness Kawaii diapers come with 2 inserts and not just one.
I'm sure they won't stick with it though. When they heard how often they had to wash the diapers, they just sort of gave a look and laughed. So yeah... I will be shocked if they stick with it for more than a week or 2. Well, they may stick it out more than that even if they don't want to since they don't have an income atm.

And SiL... ugh. Now, I know she's really uncomfortable right now and a bit miserable, but at least fake a damn smile for your kids. She's done this almost every Halloween they've come over here. They're kids and they're gonna be SUPER damn hyper and ready to go out. It can get annoying but you zone them out.
You would think she would learn how to have done that but no.. she just yells at them and just really brings down the happy time that this should be. And tonight was no different.
SiL was just in a really stank nasty mood and... yeah, just glad I didn't have to hear her shit all night.


I know I complain about them a lot. It's just that there's nowhere else for me to do it. And they must come off as terrible people, but they're really not. They have their flaws just like we all do. I'm sure if someone were to complain about me, I would sound just as terrible or worse.

Happy Halloween!!

Good lordy, I can't believe we only have 2 more months to go before 2014. SHEESH, where has the time gone??

So news news....
SiL isn't feeling good. Pregnancy is not agreeing with her in these final weeks and she's nauseated (actual throwing up), has lost her appetite and just an overall blah feeling. She said she's lost 17lbs in 2 weeks. Baby looks ok, but she's hoping they'll deliver him at 37w. I'm sure it's just b/c she feels so bad. And I'm sure her not eating a lot isn't good for him either.

She has an appointment today so we'll see what happens. :D
So excited to see my little nephew. Must say, while I am so happy for them and so happy to have a little nephew... I am SO damn jealous too.

Anyway.... they're supposed to be coming over tonight to trick or treat in our neighborhood. Which reminds me, I really need to make candy bags to give out.

We're going to walk/stroll Zoe around a little bit. Of course I'll get photos and post them :)

I'm very slowly starting to exercise again. Didn't do as much as I was wnting to this week.
Zoe sapped all of my energy yesterday. One of those almost non-stop whining screaming crying days that sucks the life right out of you. Also doesn't help that when she wasn't crying, she was trying her best to eat the potting soil... which also reminds me that I need to move them until we figure out how to keep her out of them.

I'm still experiencing some dizziness. Still not sure what's going on with that. We really need to find ourselves a family doctor so we can take our asses. DH really needs to go. He is healthy, but he hasn't been to an actual doctor in.. man, I don't even know.
He's a typical guy basically.

Oh, I bought snaps to convert the newborn diapers. Snaps are F-ing EXPENSIVE. UGH I don't want to say how much I've spent on them. I had to go out and buy more! And of course what do I see.... nice diaper velcro right underneath that I could've gotten if I had just looked. UGH!
Whatever. Hopefully I'm not ruining these things.. b/c if so... man, what a waste of money!


And finally... if you're ever bored and need something to do go to awkwardmessages.com . It's funny but will make you lose your faith in humanity :P

Loaning stuff out

So... SiL was in the hospital apparently b/c she was in a lot of pain.
We didn't hear about this until DH's frickin mom told us about it.... nevermind that it's MY brother's wife or anything so you would think my brother would've at least called. Hell, even my MOM who my SiL does not get along with (most of the time) knew. WTH??
Anyway, she and the baby are fine... or well, baby is fine, but SiL is still in some pain.
She said they think she bruised some ribs somehow. Probably the baby doing something in there.

Anyway, since my brother lost his job and they don't have an income any longer... told them we'd lend them a few things. Like the bottles and infant carrier carseat.
I normally wouldn't encourage anyone to take a used carseat, but we never got in to an accident w/ it and it's still perfectly fine to use until... I think 2016 so yeah. Also letting them use the stroller thing I bought for it.
Few less things they have to worry about.
Is it bad though that we'll probably never see any of the items again? Not that I want the carrier back, but the stroller yes, and the bottles, yes. Those bottles weren't cheap and I would like to use them again when we have another.. same with the stroller.
I don't mind loaning them things, BUT.... they really don't take care of their shit soooo.. yeah. Plus it's going to come back smelling like smoke and just UGH.....
They're just the kind of people you 2nd guess and lending things too b/c you're just not sure if you're gonna get it back in 1 piece.
Like with our vacuum. We splurged and bought one of those expensive ass dyson vacuums a while ago b/c cheaper ones were breaking really quick.
They wanted to borrow it for a few days... we got it back with F-ing dog chew marks/puncture holes on one of the hoses and we STILL haven't gotten the replacement for it from them like they said they ordered (uh huh.. :\)
And lending them books is GROSS b/c we get them back completely wreaking of cig smoke and that smell can not be gotten out of books.

Oh well....

So dizziness is still here. Tiny little bit of spotting after DTD, but haven't noticed anything else.
I'm thinking since I am spotting it's something to do with hormones along w/ my insulin problem. I'm going to start exercising tomorrow no matter what. If I wait for the dizziness to stop then it could be quite a while before I start and I've already put it off for too long.

OPK is still negative and I did take another HPT and BFN not that I expected anything else. Took it just to be totally sure though.

Not sure what's going on

... with my body.
This dizziness will not go away. It's not as bad as it first was but it's still here.
Don't have an ear infection, at least nothing I can feel.
Haven't felt like I was having any sort of blood pressure issues either so I doubt it's that.
Only other thing is maybe blood sugar issues? Gosh I hope not. Our eating hasn't been the best, but it hasn't been terrible either... *shrugs*
Will clean it up a bit more though and hope for the best.

Also... just about had a damn heart attack. I know dizziness can occur with pregnancy BUT I'm only cd 16 of this cycle.
I just wiped away a tiny little bit of tinge on the tp. Was using an opk so decided to use a pregnancy test as well.
Messed on the computer a bit, looked over (it had been maybe 3-4 mins), and saw a clear as day line on the HPT. Cue the heart attack. Thankfully though it was just a weird dye line making its way across the test.
I say thankfully b/c... at cd 16 and with that period I just had and now this spotting... yeah... it would make me very scared if I got a positive HPT. Afraid that something was wrong :(
There was something on that HPT though. I'm sure it was just the usual bad quality shadowy negative test line showing though b/c the OPK was very very very light.

Anyway, my body is just so F-ing out of whack right now :( My hair is really starting to come out too. At least that's what it seems like whenever I take a shower and pull out a dozen or so when I'm shampooing.


In other news... we bought Zoe new earrings :D She lost one of her gold ones. Can't find it anywhere so we're trying hoops. We were at Petsmart and there's a jewelry store right beside it so we decided to look. They had some really cute little ones that is exactly what we were looking for and got them. I'll get some photos of her w/ them. :)

Same old

Just wanted to come and update.
Really nothing much going on.

Woke up w/ the room spinning today. Not sure WTH is going on but I've been getting dizzy all day if I bend over. I'm not dehydrated and it doesn't feel like I'm getting sick so... *shrugs*

Started OPKs. Can only hope my body decides to work this cycle. If not.. thankfully my doc gave me 3 more provera refills so I'm set for that just in case.

Zoe is good. She's becoming more independent and more needy every day. It's weird. One min she'll be happy playing by herself... then the next, all she wants to do is be in my face and the center of attention heh. Guess I have to get used to this. At least until she's a teen w/ raging hormones and wants nothing but her privacy :P lol

Really not much going on.. as I already said heh. Days are getting shorter and cooler (WOO!), this year is almost over... and yeah.... just life stuff happening :)

Blogging for my sanity!!

Zoe is having a fit in her room right now b/c she's tired but is refusing to take a damn nap!!!
I hate hearing her fussy screams. Breaks my heart but is also SUPER damn frustrating.
Just GO TO SLEEP and you'll be happy when you wake up!

Anyway, on cuter news lol....
 Her new words are "Go Away" LOL. She doesn't know what it means but she says it crystal clear. Not even like a babyfied version of it.
She'll start to babble and if she says something that sounds like something, I'll repeat it as whatever it sounds like. She said something and it sounded like "Go Away" so I repeated it back to her and man, she clung on to it and loves saying it heh.

She also enjoys saying No, and Stop along with a pointed finger hand gesture with both lol. Not really sure she knows what they mean though. Or if she does know, she doesn't care :P heh

Her skin problems are still there. It wasn't dairy. We started giving her milk again and other than some gas, her skin problem hasn't gotten worse and no flare ups.
It did flare up at the fair though after giving her some elephant ear. We thought maybe it was the wheat or gluten, but she's had both before and I don't THINK there was a problem after. Will have to keep an eye on it though when she has those things again.
Oh and the gross poo problem did clear up after stopping the almond milk.

We've just been lotioning her and hoping that helps.
____

SiL's baby shower tomorrow. Good lord we bought a lot of baby clothes for her LOL.
I wish we had more money. Would like to buy them more stuff. I hate shopping... except for baby shopping. Baby stuff is just so dang fun to get!!

Lets see.... we got them a diaper bag (it was actually free from Babies R Us since we spent $50?).
Lots of clothes
10pk Wash cloth
Boppy Pillow
This other cute wash cloth set
Aaaand I think that's it.
Then I made a mobile, blanket, and a cute hat.

The mobile was fun to make.... I just hope they actually hang it up. They'll have to hang it from the ceiling and.. yeah.. them being them.. I would not be surprised if we went over there and it's been pushed in to the corner covered in dog crap and pee. Hope not.

Anyway, would've loved to have gotten them more since not a lot of people are coming, but oh well.
We got them what we could.
____

AF is FINALLY on her way out. Still spotting just a little, but hopefully it will be completely gone by tomorrow or Sunday.
I'm still feeling some aches in the right O area. I hope it's not some HUGE cyst that's going to cause problems.
Also... my boobs are a bit sensitive. They're not super painful or anything like that, but they're sore if grabbed..... something that DH and I both learned last night when he was copping a feel lol.
Just not used to my boobs have any amount of soreness to them.
Gosh I hope it means my body will work this cycle.
Would be nice to get pregnant, but I'd settle just for ovulation and a normal period on my own.

Ok, enough already

Could this period start lightening up already?? Damn man...
What other creature on earth can bleed this damn much for this long and still be alive? Seriously... this is getting ridiculous.
Making me think those other "periods" weren't real ovulatory ones. *shrugs*

This is day 4 of heavy bleeding. It's not AS heavy but still heavy. Surprised I'm not walking around as pale as a ghost and ready to pass out. Geeze.
Ok AF, time to start packing your bags!

I had the saddest and gross dream last night.
I dreamt I passed this HUGE sac. Realized in the dream that it was an amniotic sac and that I miscarried. I started to tear open the sac looking for the baby to try to save it :(
____

No almond milk for Zoe yesterday. She didn't poop again after her giant nasty one first thing in the morning.
She had some poop before her nap today. Still kinda juicy but not nearly the amount of the last nasty one. Hoping when she poops again it's going to be a normal turd.
____

There's really not too much to report on. The weather is clouded over but nice and cool. We have a bunch of windows open and I think I'm actually going to have to close a couple b/c it's getting a little chilly.
Can't believe this year is almost over.
____

Oh and as for weight loss. It's pretty much stalled. Thankfully it hasn't gone back UP like it was doing. I know it was just water weight, but it still sucked to see.
I think it would be fair to say that we probably won't have a real chance at trying until next year if I don't kick myself in the ass already and start exercising to help w/ the weight loss.
I have to do something. Plan on it after this period from heaven/hell stops or at least lightens up some!